caruso

David Caruso, the “CSI: Miami” star who is also the single greatest human being on television, will be taking off his sunglasses and putting them back on with a little more panache following the news that his longtime stalker has been deported to her native Austria.david-caruso-comic

Last month, lawmen in Mexico nabbed fortysomething Heidimarie Schnitzer, who was wanted for allegedly sending more than 100 letters to the CSI: Miami star and threatening to kill him when he refused her an autograph. She was handed over to authorities in her home country Thursday, officials said.

Schnitzer was charged with stalking and threatening murder in 2007. An arrest warrant was issued following two missed court appearances in Innsbruck. A new trial date has not yet been set, but if convicted, the Caruso fan may face up to three years behind bars.

Reached for comment, Caruso said, “Where she’s going, there’ll be plenty of time to take… stalk of her life.”  YEEAAAAA AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!