OH MY GOD JIM CRAMER GOT RAPED
03.13.09You know, I was just as bored by this whole Jon Stewart vs Jim Cramer/CNBC as everyone else. But I tuned in to “The Daily Show” last night out of curiosity, expecting the usual five-minute interview and some anticlimactic joking.
Um, no. It was a 15-minute evisceration. If this were a boxing match the referee would’ve stopped it in the second round. Or Cramer would be dead. Whatever Cramer’s shortcomings as a financial analyst — and according to this interview, they are many and substantial — you have to give him credit for not biting a cyanide pill or slashing his own throat 30 seconds into part 2 of the interview (see below).
Seriously, I haven’t been this uncomfortable since my dad asked me what bukkake was.
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I don’t know, I mean I love Jon Stewart and all, but he came off as kind of a dick to me. He showed clip after clip of Cramer, but when Cramer tried to defend himself, Stewart said “it’s not about you.”
“It’s not a fucking game.”
If you paused it right as Jon Stewart said this, you can see Jim’s balls evaporating.
Stewart looked as if he said that to stop Cramer from opening his shirt to reveal c4. Cramer was unprepared for such an attack. He was ready for a boring kiss and make up scene. Instead his show got called retarded and he got called a criminal by someone who proved they are “a voice of the people”. I wouldn’t be surprised if Cramer spent the night in the shower with his clothes on screaming “it’s nobodies fault!”
Stewart went into berserker mode. He came after Cramer like a whirling dervish, all fists and elbows. Cramer was screaming no no no, but all Stewart heard was “who wants cake?”
@Taco
The point, I think, is that Cramer had no defense. And far from being a dick, this rare-moment-of-truth-on-tv is exactly why I have so much admiration for Jon Stewart…
no fucking joke my mom asked me what a bukakke is one day because she heard howard stern say it.
@Papa
If he had no defense, then what’s the point of having Cramer on? I thought it was to give him a chance to respond.
Geeze, Cramer reminds me of Burke in “Aliens”:
“It was a bad call, Ripley. It was a bad call.”
I think that it’s about time that someone called the CNBC “experts” on the carpet for their complicity and cupidity. I did give Mr. Cramer huge credit for taking one for the team without immediately throwing his colleagues overboard, and for his willingness to pledge to do it differently in the future. But in this instance, Jon Stewart did speak for a lot of us, and did what had to be done in a very clear, confrontive, but not nasty way.
By the way, what’s “bukkake”? Some kind of Polish pastry?
@Old: “Bukkake”, as I understand it, is something you say at a surprise party.
And yes, Cramer now wears a shock collar, controlled by Jon Stewart.
I agree that Cramer and the rest of the CNBC types had it coming. That’ll teach you to get up to such “shenanigans,” you!
+1 Doug. If you have no other defense than this, you deserve to get sodomized on television.
If he had no defense, then what’s the point of having Cramer on? I thought it was to give him a chance to respond.
He had a chance to respond. It’s not Stewart’s fault that his response was “No mas.”
never thought id enjoy seeing a balding 48 year old man get raped
Awesome, just spectacular. Who really believes the knobs at CNBC aren’t complicit in all this?
Is it okay if I don’t think John Stewart is the greatest satirical mind of the 21st century? Or, since I spend a lot of time on this fancy inter-thingy do I have to kneel before his genius?
Thanks I’ll sit down and wait for what I’m sure will be a reasoned well thought out answer.
I have a major in economics and the great thing that you learn in econ. is that NO ONE KNOWS ANYTHING. There are ways to predict what will probably happen, but all these CNBC experts like Cramer who speak with such certainty are complete frauds, but the average viewer is more to blame.
It’s like that old H.L. Mencken saying “Nobody ever went broke underestimating the intelligence of the American people”
“I have a major in economics” is when I stopped reading.
Is it okay if I don’t think John Stewart is the greatest satirical mind of the 21st century?
Whatever floats your boat.
“Kangaroo Jack” was the number one movie in this country when it came out. There’s no accounting for taste.
I’ve had enough of your Kangaroo Jack-bashing, young man!
Stewart raped his ass good. No roofies, no lube.
To: Taco_JOnes
“…I love Jon Stewart and all, but he came off as kind of a dick to me…”
Yes, millions of Americans are seeing their hard earned retirement money VANISH. WE NEED MORE PEOPLE TO KIND OF ACT LIKE DICKS, FROM NOW ON, FOREVER!!!
Christ, you’d think CNBC was every warmingglow commenter’s stock broker. Were you all really listening to them for advice?
I’ve had enough of your Kangaroo Jack-bashing, young man!
I’m sorry, sir. I saw some older boys doing it and just wanted to fit in.
“Kangaroo Jack”? I guess I should get out more often.
I just sat thru the unedited version I don’t know if that’s what Matt posted, but here it is if Matt posted the aired version.
[blog.indecisionforever.com]
We kept our kids from seeing Kangaroo Jack because we knew it sucked and it was highly inappropriate for their young eyes. That didn’t stop some parents. I’d like to thank those parents for the moment my own son, imitating his classmate, exited school, grabbed both of my wife’s breasts and exclaimed “Hey, they’re real!” Thanks Rob Reiner, douchetard.
I know you guys love stories.
Jim Cramer, u got PWND! Get that man a tissue.
@TACO
I gave all of my money to a Nigerian Prince.
@Boom
Then the Nigerian government should reimburse you and the founder of yahoo should be breated on TV for letting the email go through.
@Taco
If there’s any way I can still get that 10 inch penis that would be great too.
@Buddy: Kind of sounded like you were looking for a fight there. Everyone’s entitled to their own opinion. Generally, though, one would offer it along with a reason, rather than making a vague and unfounded statement followed by a blanket insult for anyone who disagrees. Ironic, considering the insult accused Stewart fans of exactly that. (And for the record, while I like Stewart, I also do not consider him to be a golden god. My comment applies specifically to you and the hypocritical nature of your “argument”.)
@Taco: This is about more than just the commentators of Warming Glow. I personally do not watch CNBC, and if you had actually read some of the comments, you’d probably have drawn the same conclusion as me that most of the commentators also do not. There are a lot of other things I don’t do, however, that many other people do and maybe should not. It’s perfectly normal to be angry about a person’s or persons’ actions without having been directly affected by by them.
@Tim
Douchetard is my new favorite word.
“It’s not a fucking game,” he said, just before introducing a segment on puppets who teach lessons on abortion by farting.
Criticizing Cramer for telling people to leave their money in the market is like criticizing Stewart for … oh, I don’t know, … taking a politician’s quote out of context to make him look stupid. These people are entertainers. They do whatever gives them the biggest audience. Anyone who bases real life decisions on what Cramer or Stewart say is a moron.
I’ve loved Jon Stewart since his Mtv show, when he played that clip of Elizabeth Shue brushing her hand across his junk over and over and over. But this is so hypocritical and dumb that it hurts my brain.
@The Comish: the difference being that John Stewart has never been touted as an “expert” it’s a satire
I can’t believe that one moron tried to say Cramer telling people to LOSE REAL MONEY is equal to a fake news show.