Every time I see a clip of Andy Rooney on CBS’s “60 Minutes,” I want it to never end. This clip is 37 seconds. I can barely tie my shoes in 37 seconds. When I was younger I could tie them faster, but I’ve slowed down as I’ve gotten older. Seagulls never seem to get old, though. I hear them and I think of the beach, and what kind of garbage they might have eaten yesterday. I can’t remember what I ate yesterday, but it probably wasn’t garbage. That’s the great thing about potato chips — you can eat them.

Oh, so I have to see my court appointed psychiatrist three times per week, but this guy is allowed to be on tv?
“I hope my shoes don’t eat my fudge.”?
Crazy people don’t even sound that crazy. And they’re crazy!
Did you ever really look at an old guy’s ear hair? Speaking of hair, what with a hair cut costing more than $1.25? What is this the 2000′s?
What? They keep him locked up in that office all the time now don’t they?