STEPHEN COLBERT KILLS GLENN BECK
04.01.09Sadly, that headline is figurative, not literal. As much as I try to maintain a centrist stance politically, I think we can all agree that Glenn Beck’s insane populist posturing in front of an enlarged Constitution on Fox News richly deserves Stephen Colbert’s skewering. Either Stephen Colbert’s skewering, or patriotic euthanasia.
I’d prefer the latter, of course. If only there were kill shelters for ideologues. Who wouldn’t love that? Picture Glenn Beck getting a lethal injection, and just try not to hum “The Battle Hymn of the Republic.” Oh, okay. So now I’m the bad guy? Just for wanting to watch someone die?
Well, I’ll have you know that wanting to watch someone die is a prerequisite for getting your own show on Fox News. Maybe I can take over Glenn’s time slot.

“Maybe I can take over Glenn’s time slot.”
Well, how’s your buzz-cut looking?
Why is Chuck Norris’ babe wearing a bedazzled PEACE shirt?
Doesn’t she love her country enough to be pro war?
I, for one, was hoping for a link to a video.
Latest rumor is that Keith Olbermann is slated to join Fox as part of a “Point/Counterpoint”-type show with Bill O’Reilly…
He not only killed him, he urinated on the corpse.
Speaking of which, what’s the over/under on how long it takes that crybaby Beck to piss his pants live on the air?
I, for one, was hoping for literalism. I’m not particularly political, just misanthropic.