06.17.09 GUY WHO WALKED 2200 MILES ‘TOO NICE’ FOR TV

For some inexplicable reason, Greg Insco, a 26-year-old Cincinnati man, wanted to be cast in a future season of “Survivor.”  So he hand-delivered his audition tape to the producers… after walking the 2,200 miles to Hollywood.  Their verdict?  Insco was “too nice” for the show.

“The producer said I would get eaten alive, I said ‘By who? Ronald McDonald?’ If being too nice doesn’t get you on a TV show, that’s crooked isn’t it? Should I just be a jerk?” [Insco said.]

To answer his question: yes.  TV producers are like girls: they’re drawn in by guys who are dicks.

And as it turns out, the hardest part about walking 2200 miles is arriving in the glimmering cesspool of rotten human souls that is Los Angeles:

“I’ve walked through miles here [in L.A.] where even the homeless won’t say hi back to me,” he said. “I just saw 30 Bentleys drive by but people here have forgotten what reality is. People die and are poor and don’t get everything they want.”

You mean like you?

The life he is returning to, Insco said, is more reality than the producers will ever understand. When the real estate agent returns to Cincinnati, he will be greeted by about $70,000 in credit card debt, foreclosed property and a repossessed car.

But there’s a happy ending, right?

Insco said he planned to stay the night in Beverly Hills and wasn’t sure how he would get back to Cincinnati.

Hooray!  A fun night out in Beverly Hills!  All’s well that ends well, I say.