Not sure if you guys have gotten the news yet, but Michael Jackson died Thursday afternoon. If you TiVo the news and watch it four days later, I apologize for the spoiler. Anyway, I have to give Jimmy Kimmel credit for being the only late-night host to tell jokes about Jackson’s death on the same day he died (although it should be noted that Letterman and the New York-based shows had already taped). It’s a good routine — the jokes are fairly funny without being disrespectful, and Kimmel handles it well.
I’m sure some people are pissed, though. Some people just prefer being offended to feeling better by laughing. What, somebody died so now I can’t laugh? F you, pal. You’re probably the same person who’s asked me not to use the word retard. Yeah, I have a relative with Down Syndrome, too: he’s retarded. Stop being so gay. Ah jeez, there’s another angry email.
[via]

Whaddaya get when you cross a retard with a Jew? Michael Jackson is dead.
P.S. I have a dead retarded Jewish cousin so it’s cool.
suck a dick up
Kimmel never thinks it’s too soon. For example, when he banged a hooker last week he said “Heeeeeeeeeeeeere’s Jimmy!” when he put on a condom.
Stop being gay? Why I never!
/turns on soccer game
Nor can I believe Fred Travalena’s tastless impression of him…
When Gary Glitter dies*, will CNN talk about how stadium anthems have been changed forever and that incredible sales of JOCK ROCK will cement his legacy as a transcendent performer, or will then mention he was a kiddie diddler?
* checks Google. Yup, still alive.
Matt’s relative with Down Syndrome: Matt.
*ducks snake skin shoe*