gettysburg-chickenAmbrose T. Feathersworth: abolitionist and trusted aide-de-camp of Lincoln, forgotten by history

Natural History of the Chicken (PBS) — I think that this has actually aired on PBS before, but I just wanted to call your attention to the fact that there’s a PBS special called “Natural History of the Chicken.”  I have officially nothing in common with people who watch PBS.

Your Worst Animal Nightmares (Animal Planet) — Is there one about flying sharks?  That’s the worst one I’ve had.

World’s Strongest Toddler (TLC) — Okay, I hate TLC, but this is cool: it’s about Liam Hoekstra, a three-year-old who has washboard abs thanks to an AWESOME disease that “promotes above-normal growth of the skeletal muscles; it doesn’t affect the heart and has no known negative side effect.”  Lucky bastard. (See photos here)

Dollars and Danger: Africa, The Final Investing Frontier (CNBC) — The theory: with its plentiful natural resources, Africa might actually benefit in a slowed-down global economy.  Erin Burnett reports on whether it’s worth risking getting attacked by AIDS lions and warlord prostitutes.  Or so I assume.

Wipeout (ABC) — Two hours of people getting falling into mud and getting hit in the face.  And yet: still way more intelligent than two hours of “I’m a Celebrity.”

Extreme Animal Encounters (Travel) — I had a three-way with some bottlenose dolphins.  Man, dolphins are super-freaky.  Jacques Cousteau called them “nature’s frotteurs.”