Jon & Kate Plus 8 (TLC) — Ever since Friday, there’s been an endless stream of stories about tonight’s “special episode” with a “big announcement” about the “new direction” in their lives. Golly, what could it possibly be?
Run’s House (MTV) — The Run family is shocked that Rev’s son JoJo has been booked for possession of marijuana. OMG! A teenager doing pot!?!?! What is the world coming to?
The Secret Life of the American Teenager (ABC Family) — Thankfully, on ABC Family, teenagers don’t do pot. Get pregnant and have kids, sure. But that’s just because they say no to drugs and condoms.
The Bachelorette (ABC) — Two hours for eight guys to get whittled down to three. Do you really want to spend one-twelfth of your day watching “The Bachelorette”?
The Closer (TNT) — Mary McDonnell of “Battlestar Galactica” fame guest stars. I’d give that a thumbs-up or a thumbs-down, but that’s more effort than I care to make.
New York Goes to Work (VH1) — Frankly, I’d like to see her get a job in an Asian massage parlor. Or would she be considered overqualified for that?
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I blame Kate’s haircut for the divorce, that and the fact she is a cunt.
The most important thing for the kids to remember from all of this is that the divorce was entirely their fault.
Would somebody please end this bloody train-wreck already.
So will this also include a draft to see which kids end up with which parent?
Maybe Jon is finally getting that vaginal orifice sewn up and growing some balls.
Usually if you want to see 10 people’s lives destroyed, you have to watch five episodes of Deal or No Deal