THIS VIDEO WILL RAPE YOUR DREAMS
09.23.09I’d like to take a brief break from TV-related content to share this video that will put a stop to all those pesky hours of sleep you’ve been getting every night. It’s a really good video; my favorite part is when I start crying and lose the will to live. I had no idea that all it took was a few prosthetics and some body paint to transform a man into some perverse cross-breed that not even the ancient Greeks could dream up. Well done, 21st century.
Of course, this being the Internet, nothing strange exists by itself. I’m afraid that after I exposed myself to this, I was compelled to pull on the loose thread of this nightmare sweater and take the terrifying journey that is YouTube’s “humanimal” tag. The horse is by far the creepiest, but the deer and tiger aren’t far behind.
You know, when I was a kid, I got turned on by Cheetara from “Thundercats.” Never again. If anyone needs me I’ll be removing my eyes and dipping them in bleach.
UPDATE: Courtesy of @twoeightnine, I learned that our hunky horse-man is Russian. He’s a model who’s “reliable and professional,” as evidenced by him being very serious about wearing body paint to look like a horse.

There’s a new link to this video on Metacafe:
http://www.metacafe.com/channels/Humanimal+Alex/
Somewhere, oh i dunno, Japan maybe, there’s a guy just putting the finishing touches to his clown/octopus outfit with which he’s unwittingly going to ensure a Nessun Dorma scenario for the entire human race.
Just what the hell did you type into your search engine? Weirdo.
Nice gloves, asshole.
dammit, I’ve read WL and other sites long enough to know to always go with the “nice shoes asshole” comment. That’s why Matt gets paid the big bucks.
Son of a bitch. Someone always beats me to the nice shoes.
Nice shoes, asshole.
No way I sleep alone tonight. Daughter, get in here.
I’m going to show this to my 4 and 2 year olds and tell them if they don’t behave the Black Stallion will take them away. Sure they won’t sleep for a few years and will need counseling, but whatever it takes to get them to listen.
The WWE is getting pretty lame.
Wait, is that Jaycee Duggard’s house?
Is that Nic Cage? It Is! Nice try with the mane, Nic. Also, nice prosthetic nose. Trying to bring your fivehead into proportion? Well done, sir.
there’s a reason he’s doing that in the woods somewhere instead of in his back yard.
What’s that in my eye? oh, right, a hoof pick.
Truly the most disturbing Barbaro tribute video ever.
The internet is indeed a terrible place.
What did we ever do to you?