10.27.09 LINKS: BEAR + HORSE = BEAROTAUR!

BEAROTAUR! You know what I like about Bearotaur? He’s got sharp hooves and deadly claws, but he still opts to carry around a mace. I think we’d get along, as long as he doesn’t like “Entourage.” [Unicorn Wolf Lasers F You]

As it turns out, teenage girls aren’t the best criminal masterminds. Police have arrested four suspects in the burglaries of the homes of Lindsay Lohan, Paris Hilton, Audrina Patridge, Orlando Bloom, and Rachel Bilson: four girls aged 18 and 19. And surprise, one of the girls was arrested on the set of her reality TV show about aspiring actresses trying to make it in Hollywood. Frankly, I expected more from someone on a reality show. More murder. [LA Times]

Five Reasons to Not Want to be Don Draper Any More. Eh, I dunno. I kinda still want to be him. [Asylum]

‘Modern Family’ only getting better: Chazz Palmintieri and Elizabeth Banks will guest star in upcoming episodes of ABC’s freshman sitcom. [TV Guide]

Gotta keep your pimp hand… meaty? Presenting the meat hand. It’s a hand made out of meatloaf. [Not Martha via Buzzfeed]

Yay? Lisa Kudrow will guest star on “Cougar Town.” Wonderful news from Hollywood’s most annoying writer. [Ausiello Files]

‘Family Guy’ then and now: The best and most succinct explanation for why I used to love the show but never bother any more. [Star War Figure]

Shut up, Martha Stewart! Christina Hendricks, who is 34 but still looks like a youthful angel with big tits, went on Martha Stewart’s show, where Stewart told her, “I must say, I thought you were much older.” [Jezebel]