NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
10.12.09
“Mad Men” actress Christina Hendricks took a huge step in breaking off my imaginary love affair with her yesterday when she married comedic actor and human-sized fish/troll mutant hybrid Geoffrey Arend at New York City restaurant Il Buco. People says:
The redheaded Hendricks, 34, and actor Arend, 31, were engaged earlier this year after being introduced by her Mad Men costar Vincent Kartheiser…
Hendricks said she loves “everything” about Arend. “He’s considerate, he’s thoughtful, he’s smart, he takes care of me,” she said in July. “He’s very, very giving.”
Not on a list of “everything”: handsome. Listen, I don’t expect famous sexy people like Christina Hendricks to date unfamous sexy people like me. I know my lot in life. But this just sets a bad example for the rest of the world. Because if that dude gets Christina Hendricks, then I warrant a Brazilian bikini model with no gag reflex and a vibrating vagina. So ladies, if that’s not you, forget about getting with this. You can blame Christina Hendricks.
UPDATE: Just Jared has photos from the wedding. This may come as a bit of a surprise, but she looks really pretty and he’s not very attractive.
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I’m obsessed with alison brie and I want to fuck her asshole
my guess is this guy is swinging a baseball bat.
“…he takes care of me, He’s very, very giving.”
Probable translation: “…he has a 12 inch dick and a tongue that would make Gene Simmons jealous. Besides I close my eyes during sex anyway.”
Seriously, how the fuck did this chud get a beautiful goddess like Christina. Must have used a mind mind controlling roofie.
Christina Hendricks…married this guy. The Stoned guy from Super Troopers. The Ugly, ugly, guy from Super Troopers. Not even a member of the main cast of Super Troopers…………………………
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Anyone wanna join me on a cross country shooting rampage?
I’ve hated Vincent Kartheiser ever since he played David Boreanaz’s pussy emo son in Angel. Now I really want him dead.
I don’t think much of his tailor either.
Why do I bother working out, showering, or generally taking care of myself again? Seems like being a dumpy mess works out better.
I know beauty is in the eye of the beholder and all of that, but I still can’t believe she’s married to this guy, even if he WAS in an episode of Undeclared.
While few people will come to that guy’s defense, he *was* in an episode of “Undeclared.” And I like that show.
Vibrating vaginas are overrated. They batteries die much too quickly.
I think this blog needs to take a decidedly more Alison Brie direction as retribution for this heinous act. At least until she marries somebody in the cast of Super Troopers.
I bet she ate all the cake.
*takes picture of middle finger, inserts in envelope*
Does anyone have Vincent Kartheiser’s address?
Christina, honey, your husband played a retard in The Ringer. Amongst a cast of actual retards. You are fucking this guy. It breaks me heart.
But do her nipples taste like snozberries?
Look at it this way: If she’s willing to marry a dude that ugly, maybe she’s also willing to fuck a dude who looks like you.