I can no more easily tell different kinds of Asian kanji apart than I can types of Asian people, so I’ll have to take the Angry Clam‘s word that this is a Chinese infomercial — not Japanese — advertising a magical bra that increases breast size at the push of a button. Seems like SOME country has spent a little too much time making anime of schoolgirl tentacle rape bukkake and has fallen behind in the creepy bra infomercial race.

I checked with a friend who lived in China (the inimitable Spencer Hall), and he confirmed the authenticity:

We used to watch these ALL THE TIME. They have one for shrinking your vagina. [translating as he watches] At one point they’re just saying BIG! BIGGER! REALLY BIGGER!!!!

Excellent! Oh, and I was kidding about telling different kinds of Asian people apart. You immerse yourself in the industry like I do and eventually you can differentiate a Thai ladyboy from your basic Vietnamese child sex slave from 100 yards. I have that on my resume under “Additional Skills,” I might add.