11.05.09 YOU CANNOT BE SERIOUS: ‘2012′ SEQUEL COMING TO TV

Watch out, Jesus!

Roland Emmerich, the director of 2012 and maestro of disaster porn, confirmed what nobody suspected or desired when he told Entertainment Weekly that he was working on developing a televised sequel for 2012 called “2013.” “But Matt,” you’re saying, “isn’t 2012 about the end of the world?” Why yes. Yes it is. This is a sequel to the end of everything. Makes perfect sense if you don’t think about it.

Word in Hollywood is that [2012 producer Mark] Gordon has already entered talks with ABC to develop the disaster drama. Though Gordon wouldn’t confirm this, he did tell EW that ABC “will have an opening in their disaster-related programming after Lost ends” (An ABC spokeswoman declined to comment). “I think people would be interested in this topic on a weekly basis,” Gordon said, who also attended Tuesday’s premiere [of 2012]. “There’s hope for the world despite the magnitude of the 2012 disaster as seen in the film. After the movie, there are some people who survive and the question is how will these survivors build a new world and what will it look like. That might make an interesting TV series.”

If I’m being fair, a story about people trying to survive after the apocalypse could be a good story. But if I’m being honest, everything that Roland Emmerich makes is complete dog crap. And not even real dog crap. CGI dog crap. As post-apocalyptic stories go, this will be way more like Waterworld than The Road.

(for more, peruse the 2012 tag at FilmDrunk)