STEPHEN COLBERT + ALICIA KEYS FTW
12.16.09Alicia Keys was on “The Colbert Report” last night to promote her new album, and it was top-to-bottom excellent television. Not only did she capably match wits with Colbert during her interview (and look so, so, SO hot doing it), but she then played “Empire State of Mind,” and Colbert — who lamented the lack of shout-outs to the suburbs in the song — filled in on Jay-Z’s verse, changing the lyrics to fit his own New York story about moving from the Upper East Side to a gated community in Connecticut. It was really, truly AWESOME.
As good as Colbert is as a fake pundit, I always like him best when he takes on the broader role of entertainer-at-large. In fact, I’m going to go ahead and put my vote in for an Alicia Keys/Steven Colbert variety show. I’d watch the sh-t out of that. They could do it unscripted and it’d still be better than Jay Leno.
(Video of the interview and performance below.)
(Keys’s mention of sheep is a reference to this skit with “Mad Men’s” John Slattery from earlier in the show.)
[YouTube versions of the videos at RealTalkNY]


Colbert lives in a gated community in Jersey, not Connecticut. But he still looks awful in a hoodie. Shame, I was rooting for him as a gangsta.
My inner black guy loves that thick ass, but my inner white guy doubts she’d be ok with me driving a suzuki.
(My inner mexican is sleeping…so tired…)
Wow. Apparently I can watch US video feeds that are usually blocked at home from work. Finally a reason to be here. Sometimes Canada doing things backwards works out.
Alicia Keys >>>>> Rihanna
Much as I love the Report, am I the only one who think’s Colbert’s true calling is to be this generation’s Johnny Carson?
Someone get me Alicia Keys agent STAT. I’ve got a few jobs for her that could be…shall we say…quite lubricative.
/wink wink
Fucking brilliant.
How is he not hosting every award event everywhere?
Preach.
Ten bucks says that Roger Sterling wore Alicia’s ass out after the show.
@ me
Wrong form of your/you’re, asshole.
Cut to the post-apocalyptic scenario, where Slattery is dressing down an underling:
You don’t know how to fuck sheep, you’re whole generation. You do it for the wrong reasons. My generation, we fuck sheep because it’s good. Because it feels better than unbuckling your collar. Because we deserve it.
We fuck sheep because it’s what men do.
Anyone know how to photoshop my cock onto that microphone on the second video?