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12.01.09 THE FREEDOM TRAY IS JUST WHAT YOUR FAT CLUMSY ASS NEEDS

While watching the Pitt-West Virgina game on Friday night, I saw this ad for the Freedom Tray, a ridiculous product with an even more ridiculous advertising pitch. In case you haven’t already heard, the Freedom Tray — so named because it’s made in America, presumably during George W. Bush’s presidency — is the preferred method for carting around jumbo sodas and nitrate-rich food for your obese family.

I can’t decide which part of this commercial I like best: I definitely enjoy the part where the announcer is all, “Is carrying food for your family TOO MUCH PRESSURE for your cholesterol-choked heart?” but I think I’m leaning toward the image of a fast food worker handing the mom her drive-thru order on the Freedom Tray. As if Mom made her drive-thru order, then pulled up and said, “Hold on, take my order out of those paper sacks and give it to me on this.” Bravo, Freedom Tray. Bra. Vo.

12 Comments » TAGS: ADS, COMMERCIALS, FATTIES

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There are 12 comments about:
THE FREEDOM TRAY IS JUST WHAT YOUR FAT CLUMSY ASS NEEDS

December 1st, 2009 at 2:21 pm

Upstate Underdog says:

The freedom try, like my dong, collapses down to one inch thick when I’m done using it. Freedom tray, fuck yeah!

December 1st, 2009 at 2:28 pm

Unsilent Majority says:

It’s the tray terrorists don’t want you to know about!

December 1st, 2009 at 2:50 pm

Deebs says:

Great product! I hope someday this same company comes up with an incention to quiet the noise my cat makes when it walks through the house. That cat is so LOUD! (holds ears to heads, rocks from side to side wincing as cat gently stomps by)

December 1st, 2009 at 2:51 pm

Deebs says:

Or, you know, an invention would be nice too.

December 1st, 2009 at 2:56 pm

CrabApple says:

My favorite part is that the “Made in the USA Freedom Tray” has some Dutch/Canadian woman selling it to you.

We are so fat that we cant even find a decent looking American woman to sell this shit to us.

And when in he hell did a tray become this hot new invention? If this thing makes someone a millionare then I am going to introduce “Freedom chair” next year. Sit on your fat ass and enjoy your freedom on “Freedom Chair”.

December 1st, 2009 at 3:01 pm

Lenny says:

I wash my back with a stick.

December 1st, 2009 at 3:02 pm

Upstate Underdog says:

Lenny, you might want to put a rag on that stick.

December 1st, 2009 at 3:10 pm

Enrico Pallazzo says:

This is perfect for Cletus’s “relation”, Dia-Betty!

December 1st, 2009 at 3:19 pm

ClueHeywood says:

I’m holding out for “Freedom Trough.”

December 2nd, 2009 at 12:41 am

Eib says:

This is a sad career turn for David Silver’s Dad.

December 2nd, 2009 at 12:41 pm

Sharma says:

Eib – THANK YOU!! I kept wondering what seemed familiar about this commercial (other than how I constantly drop fast food all over my car) and then realized it was Mel Silver.

Ah Mel, too many hygenists?