south-park-whale-whores

I appreciate that the Sea Shepherd society is devoted to stopping Japan’s whaling efforts. My only problem is that they do it in the gayest way possible for the exceedingly lame “Whale Wars.” And the most recent development in Sea Shepherd’s game of cat-and-super-gay-mouse with Japanese whalers is possibly the most ridiculous yet:

At 0630 Hours, Sea Shepherd Captain Peter Bethune of the vessel Ady Gil, which was sunk by the Japanese security ship Shonan Maru 2, boarded the whaling ship to conduct a citizen’s arrest of the skipper of the Shonan Maru 2.

Captain Bethune boarded the whaling ship under cover of darkness from a Jet Ski as the Shonan Maru 2 was traveling at 14 knots in the Southern Ocean… At 0800 Hours, once the sun had risen, Bethune calmly knocked on the bridge wing door, entered the wheelhouse, and presented himself to the Captain of Shonan Maru 2 where he informed the skipper that he was under arrest for the sinking of the Sea Shepherd ship Ady Gil on January 6th, 2010 [video of that here - Ed.].

All radio communications with Peter Bethune ceased at 0805. The Shonan Maru 2 did acknowledge that Bethune was onboard.

I admit, it was kinda metal to sneak onto a moving ship under the cover night via jetski in antarctic waters. But that cloak-and-dagger stuff is only cool if you follow through by knifing a bunch of henchmen and dropping a pipe bomb in the engine room. Instead, Bethune walked onto the bridge and was all, “I place you under citizen’s arrest. On your own boat. Umm… hello? Does anyone here speak English?”