dog-show

Westminster Kennel Club Dog Show (USA) — Hosted by Mario Lopez, this is your annual chance to use Fred Willard’s Best in Show quotes without remorse. Tonight, all eyes will be on last year’s winner Star Trek Dog as he tries to become the first repeat champion. Elvis Dog is scheduled to perform at halftime, and Birthday Dog will conduct red carpet interviews.

Is She Really Going Out with Him? (MTV) — Season 2 of MTV’s Hot Chicks with Douchebags: the TV Show, the television program that first gave us a glimpse of pre-”Jersey Shore” Snooki. Thanks for that.

The Bachelor (ABC) — Three bachelorettes remain. It’s the perfect reality show for people who saw Valentine’s Day this weekend.

Winter Olympics (NBC) — Figure skating, speedskating, snowboarding, and alpine skiing (weather permitting — it’s been delayed in recent days due to lack of snow). With commentary by the animated wax figure of Al Gifford and a smug little elf.

24 (Fox) — Obviously, the show is long past its prime, but I’ve found this season fairly watchable. Except for the Katee Sackhoff story line. I mean, holy crap, really? CTU can’t screen people who changed their name after being in prison? And for God’s sake, it’s freakin’ STARBUCK! Let her kick some ass already.

Anthony Bourdain: No Reservations (Travel) — Dammit, Bourdain’s in New Orleans tonight. That son of a bitch. Just thinking about what this episode might have has me hungry for Jacques-Imo’s.