Andy Cohen Hates Adorable Children
03.01.11
Andy Cohen — the Bravo executive who perniciously fills our lives with endless iterations of squabbling “Real Housewives” who are never actually housewives — was a guest on MSNBC’s execrable “Morning Joe” today, where he helped analyze the crappiness of this year’s Oscar telecast. Was it James Franco’s fault? Did people not care because all the big categories were virtual locks? No, according to Cohen, the P.S. 22 choir was the worst part of the show.
Like, I don’t need to see that. It was just bad. It was just awful. It was horrible. A public school chorus singing “Somewhere Over the Rainbow.” I literally — if I wasn’t going to go out to some parties I would have slit ‘em right then. It was the worst. I was looking for a knife to stick in my eyes, it was so terrible. […] We don’t want to see this. It just ruined everything.
That’s right: if Andy Cohen didn’t have totally fabu parties to go to, he LITERALLY would have committed suicide because of children singing. You can read more about this story and the Real Housewives in my new pamphlet “Andy Cohen is a Piece of Sh*t.”
Video below. In fairness — not that Cohen deserves it — just before he says how much he hated the children, he says that he loves public school kids. Children-bashing starts around the 3:30 mark.
[NYT/City Room via MovieLine]
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to be fair, the kids sucked and matched the faux sappiness tone, but no more than anne hathaway..
I bet when this guy saw Die Hard With A Vengeance, he was furious the bomb in the school was a dummy.
Why dont white kids ever get to perform at anything like this?
I hated this obnoxious, no-talent douche long before he ever bashed schoolchildren. It’s bad enough that he keeps making new Housewives shows, he also casts himself in all the cast reunions and post-show shows. And he is FAAAABULOUSLY uncharismatic. Every time I see one his promos I want to gouge out my eyes and eat them. Ugh.
(*looks around in horror, realizes everyone knows how much he watches Bravo*)
Uh, I mean GRRRR, FOOTBALL!
The kids were terrible. Some were stiff, others were overacting and they were not doing anything in unison. They were all standing there swaying. Their voices weren’t bad, too bad they’ll end up as guido trash in Staten Island
What else would we expect from the guy who put Kathy Griffin back on tv? That alone should have been enough to hang this guy in 2005.
It should have been written on their tee shirts which ones were told to just mouth the words.
He’s correct. Its not the kids fault however. The kids were the urine soaked toilet paper on top of the shit pile that was the Oscars.
@Danger – You what?! I just rented that film for tonight. Why would you do that to me?
/Cancels subscription to Danger Guerrero Fan Club
I started children bashing way before the 3:30 mark. Gotta start early if you’re going to keep in shape.
I know this Oscars made no sense anyways, but wouldn’t it have made more sense if these kids sang the best song nominees rather than shoving them at the end for no reason?
This guy is dumb who mouths kids anyone who does probably can’t sing either in fact I thought they were good u don’t badmouth that its foolish and u could end up saying this stuff.to the wrong person . It makes.me angry he said that its rude and just makes him ignorant