House (Fox) — Olivia Wilde returns as Thirteen in the show’s 150th episode. While Wilde has been off becoming a movie star, Thirteen has apparently been in prison. It happens to all the beautiful white female doctors.
Rediscovering Alexander Hamilton (PBS) — “Hamilton, he ain’t no president.” Awww, poor Wallace. #WireNostalgia
Law and Order: LA (NBC) — Spring premiere. The show’s been off the air for four months, during which time Dick Wolf has been making changes: writing Skeet Ulrich out, putting Alfred Molina in his place full-time, shortening the show’s title from “Los Angeles” to “LA,” and hoping desperately that CBS won’t air a crime procedural at the same time. Read Alan Sepinwall’s review here.
Dancing with the Stars (ABC) — Despite being crushed by Kirstie Alley last week, Maksim says his leg is fine. Nevertheless, I wouldn’t anticipate any overhead lifts tonight. Not without a forklift, anyway.
Being Human (Syfy) — Season finale. This American adaptation has already been picked up for a second season, though I don’t know why. Oh right, it’s because viewers like it when monsters act like emo pussies.
LATE NIGHT GUESTS: Foo Fighters on “The Daily Show,” MythBusters on Colbert, Alec Baldwin on Letterman, Jamie Foxx on Leno. You can alwats rely on Jay Leno to have the Jay Leno-est guests on TV. Full listings at TV Squad.
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Yay! Olivia’s back. House and Castle will be watched.
Why did you have to bring up Wallace? Now I’m going to be sad the rest of the day. Poor kid got got and didn’t deserve it.
It killed me a little inside when I was flipping channels and saw Wallace was on Parenthood.
taco, i was sad too when wallace was mentioned…”where’s wallace, yo!?”.
but then i looked at olivia wilde’s picture again and perked up. can that be the lead of every what’s on tonight, matt?
Wallace: Hamilton? He ain’t no president.
D’Angelo: …Ain’t no ugly ass white man get his face on no legal motherfucking tender, ‘cept he president.
RIP you snitch bitch
“It happens to all the beautiful white female doctors.”
You forgot bisexual boner factory.
I haven’t seen House all season, but I’m guessing that Thirteen went to jail for something that was technically illegal but done for a good cause? Kind of like how House illegal, unconventional stuff to save people?
Olivia Wilde is too damn pretty.
I object to the jail theme for tonight’s house based on
a) My basement is nothing like a prison, once you get past the shackles and the locks and such, and
b) They didn’t ask for my permission before filming in my basement.
Alana de la Garza > Olivia Wilde. I don’t care how inane and repetitive Law and Order gets (of any variety); as long as they have Rubirosa, I will watch it.
If I were to somehow walk through my computer monitor into the wonderful, magical place where that photograph was taken, I’d probably stand and stare slack-jawed for the next two hours and completely forget to pet Lobster Dog. Sorry about that, Lobster Dog!
@Patty Boots
She’s been gone, the subplot of this episode is apparently House is DYING to find out what she did to spend time in jail. Supposedly it’s something she’ll “have to live with the rest of my life.” So in short, yes.
Olivia Wilde almost makes watching House bearable. Of course, you also have to deal with Dr. House. “Grumble grumble pithy comment grumble mumble attempt at sexy look directed toward female costar grumble grumble I cured cancer.”
@Dux: it’s a matter of opinion, but I would rate them very close, with Olivia ahead by a nipple. But they are wreslting about it in my head every day. Alana is stronger, Olivia is quicker, both are slippery.
Well, it has happened AGAIN; Google, Olivia Wilde images, now Dr. Boner will not go away….
@ The Hammer
Damn man, that’s some cold shit.
“Motherfucker got the bone all the way out of the damn chicken.”
Dammit, Olivia! Why do you always have to overdress??
Those shoes are entirely inappropriate for beach sexing!
@ Moose:
Don’t get me wrong; I would do anything for a chance w/ Olivia Wilde, too. I just like Alana more. I think it’s the facial bone structure.
Dux; did you say “facial bone”? I’m trying to decide if Alana (I call her Alana) has fakers or not, leaning towards fakers. Well she moved to LA, so she’ll get some more sun. If I was a writer, I’d work it into the script to have the Assistant DA running down the beach in slo-mo with “very little support from the police dept.” if you know what I mean.
LOBSTERDOG!!! :D