ABC is the third network this week to release clips for all their new shows, and they actually look the worst. I don’t see a single potential break-out hit among them, although I see one — “Last Resort” — that will probably be great, but then cancelled within the first month. There are four new sitcoms (one OK, three bad), Shawn Ryan’s new show, Connie Britton’s country-music drama, Reba McEntire’s horrible plastic surgery, and Alyssa Milano in a few steamy sex scenes. Here are the clips, ranked again from first to worst.

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ABC will be returning next year with a whopping 10 new series. We will get to all of those series later today once the video previews are made available, and I’ll just say the one I’m most excited about is actually the country-music drama, but only because Connie Britton is involved. For now, we’ll just briefly go through the new schedule for next year.

MONDAY
8:00 p.m. “Dancing with the Stars” / “The Bachelor”
10:00 p.m.“Castle”

Nothing has changed here. “Dancing with the Stars” in the Fall,” followed by “The Bachelor” in the Spring.

TUESDAY
8:00 p.m.“Dancing with the Stars the Results Show”
9:00 p.m.“Happy Endings”
9:30 p.m.“Don’t Trust the B—- in Apartment 23”
10:00 p.m.“Private Practice”

In January:
8:00 p.m.“How to Live with Your Parents (For the Rest of Your Life)”
8:30 p.m.“The Family Tools”

This is the exciting night, because ABC finally had the good sense to pair their thematically similar comedies, “Happy Endings” and “Don’t Trust the B—- in Apt. 23″ together. That’s an awesome hour of comedy. The one problem? They’re going up against “New Girl” and the “Mindy Kaling Project” on Fox, which probably means they’re going to get squashed. It also means a lot of DVR juggling, and for a lot of us — especially once “Justified,” “Sons of Anarchy,” “Parenthood,” and “Southland” return — Tuesdays are going to be a scheduling sh*tshow.

Two new sitcoms will replace the “Dancing with the Stars” result show in January. I’m kind of hoping that the two new sitcoms will be terrible so I won’t have to bother watching them.

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In news that was mostly expected, but still fantastic, NBC has renewed “Parks & Recreation” for a fifth season. Even better news: it got a full 22-episode order! BOOM. None of this shortened season BS. As Alan Sepinwall at Hitfix points out, this will get the show to 90 episodes by season’s end, which is a nice number for syndication. And since NBC owns the show, they have a horse in that race. A mini-horse, if you will. (RIP Lil’ Sebastian.)

Speaking of excellent news, “Happy Endings” got renewed, too! The ABC comedy will return for a third season next fall, also getting a full 22-episode order.

Anyway, good news all around. “Community,” “30 Rock,” “Parks and Rec,” and “Happy Endings” will all be back next year, in one form or another. There’s only one appropriate way to celebrate that.

As had been rumored earlier in the week, ABC has officially canceled “Cougar Town,” and TBS has swooped in and renewed the show for two more seasons of 15 episodes apiece. The cul-de-sac crew will be back in early 2013, and because TBS also bought the rights to the show’s first 61 episodes, you’ll be seeing a lot of “Cougar Town” on TBS in the coming years.

Let’s celebrate this occasion appropriately with Laurie Keller’s Best “Cougar Town” GIFs.

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Renewal season is right around the corner. By the end of April through the first of May, final decisions will be made on the fate of most network televisions shows. It’s a nervous, jittery time, but it really shouldn’t be. Not anymore. For all the hand-wringing we do about cancelation fears, the reality is: Good shows that have been around for at least a season are rarely canceled anymore. Networks are no longer in the driver’s seat. New shows are increasingly difficult to launch. How many new big hits were there in the 2011-2012 season? Zero. How many moderately-sized hits were there? Four: “New Girl,” “Once Upon a Time,” “Revenge” and — so far — “Don’t Trust the B—- in Apt. 23.” With the increased competition from cable, it’s harder and harder to land a new show, so the networks tend to stick with what they know, even if it’s low-rated. This explains five seasons of “Chuck” and four seasons of “Fringe,” and the yearly renewal of “Community” and “Parks and Rec” despite anemic ratings. You know they’re doing gangbusters on the back-end with those shows on DVD and online licensing, though. They just have to be.

Ultimately, I wouldn’t worry too much about losing a favorite show, except for one:

ABC

On ABC, the only major bummer is the likely cancelation of “Cougar Town.” In an ideal world, it could be paired with “Happy Endings” and “Apt. 23″ in perhaps the best comedy block on network television. That’s still a possibility, and Tuesday nights would be ideal, though it woud leave the higher-rated “Last Man Standing” without a suitable pairing. More likely, only two of the three will be renewed, and “Apt. 23″ and “Happy Endings” have the better ratings. The one leg “Cougar Town” has up on the other two is two more seasons, which makes it closer to syndication money. The strike against it, however, is that Bill Lawrence is off working on a new show for another network.

Meanwhile, it’s not official yet, but “Modern Family,” “Suburgatory,” and “The Middle” will all be renewed as well, and “The Middle” may be better paired with “Last Man Standing” next season. If anyone is interested, “The Missing” will probably be canceled, however.

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