Well, this is disgusting: a Luvs commercial in which cartoon babies take gigantic diaper-filling dumps in the “Heavy Dooty Championship.” Hey parents! Does your baby take award-winning sh*ts? Then Luvs is the diaper for you!

Discussion point: what’s more disturbing? This commercial, or the fact that someone recorded it while watching Van Wilder 2: The Rise of Taj?

Below is a commercial for one of the Germanest toys to ever German. It’s called Kackel Dackel, and even though I don’t speak a lick of German, I’d guess that it translates roughly to “poop dachshund.” Or perhaps “wiener sh*thound.”

That’s right, it’s a toy wiener dog that you feed in order to make it defecate. Hahaha, what fun! It’s the perfect toy to guarantee another generation of scheisse-porn fetishists!

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Ever since I watched “Thundercats” as a kid, I’ve been kinda turned on by anthopomorphic animals. I’m not ashamed of it; Cheetara was totally hot. So this French ad for Orangina (video below) featuring various sexy anthropomorhic animals is right up my perverse alley. Topless Robot got freaked out by it, but that’s because that prude has never fantasized about a sexy bear in lingerie.

Seriously, watch this video and tell me you wouldn’t F that MILF deer. What? Why are you looking at me that way? Don’t hate me for being sexually liberated. Jeez, Americans are so puritanical.

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Mariah Carey spent several hours on Home Shopping Network yesterday in order to sell her perfume and Christmas album and whatnot to the lonely cat-petting masses, and Rich at fourfour made a supercut of her repeating the same things over and over. I GET IT, YOU’RE PREGNANT AND YOU HAVE A HEIGHTENED SENSE OF SMELL.

Nevertheless, the video is kinda hypnotic in its own way. I haven’t watched this much Mariah since the video for “Honey.” What? No I wasn’t! Shut up, YOU were masturbating to it!

A few days ago, I wrote about some shameless examples of terrible product placement ads in “Days of Our Lives.” Here’s an example of product placement being integrated a little more smoothly: in this scene from Monday night’s “Castle,” Nathan Fillion’s character advances the plot by using voice-cued Bing on his Windows Phone 7.

The OS has encountered similar heroism on FOX’s ‘Bones,’ where Dr. ‘Bones’ Brennan gets a text on her WP7 device during an interrogation. Before that, WP7 appeared on CBS’ ‘Hawaii Five-O,’ where a character actually told another to “Bing it,” when referring to a search. Microsoft is obviously trying to achieve a ubiquitous verb-form of their brand, as there is with Google (i.e. “Google it”). [Phone Arena]

While the product-whoring in the video above is obvious, I don’t find it too blatant (although, interestingly, Castle had previously used an iPhone on the show). As long as the product is used sensibly within the story’s structure, I don’t mind the occasional bit of advertising slipping into my television programs — after all, I’m practically encouraging the practice by fast-forwarding through commercials on my DVR. And I couldn’t be happier about it. Suck a moldy dildo, commercials.