If I ever make it onto “Jeopardy!” and get the clue, “A blow to the back of the neck is the punch named for this animal,” I’d happily lose $800 just to be able to say “donkey punch” on TV. I don’t know who’s the bigger hero: Mike for saying it, or Alex Trebek, who’s clearly suppressing his laughter, for knowing the reference. Do you think he spends his time trolling on Urban Dictionary? More importantly, how will “Wheel of Fortune” respond?

Before & After: TH_ FL_ING CAM_L TO_

(If you have no idea what a “donkey punch” is, check out Wikipedia — there’s even a helpful GIF!)

Read the rest of this entry »

I apologize that we only have buttcam footage of this monumental moment in game show history, but this must be seen by all: “YOUR MOMMA!” was an actual Jeopardy category last week. The contestant who chooses the category delivers the line pretty well, but it would have sounded a lot better in Sean Connery’s Scottish accent. “Four hundred dollars is more than your mother’s worth, Trebek!”

Read the rest of this entry »

Guhhhh… I admit, I love “Jeopardy,” but this is not one of the show’s finest moments. On yesterday’s episode, contestants had to identify songs that Alex Trebek sang in auto-tune with a techno beat. So if you’ve been dying to hear a game show host sing a techno auto-tuned version of “The Battle Hymn of the Republic,” today’s your lucky day, because the video is below. “Hiiiiis truuuuuth… is… marchinnnnng onnnn…” *wipes away single tear*

Read the rest of this entry »

Here’s a collection of clips from 1990 that show Alex Trebek recording promos for Phone Jeopardy, a 900-number service that allowed people to play the game from home. It’s fun to watch Trebek’s slow burn of irritation — it’s like a less volatile version of Bill O’Reilly’s “WE’LL DO IT LIVE!” freakout.

It also makes me realize how much I miss Trebek’s mustache. That facial hair was a true piece of Americana. Man, Zsa Zsa Gabor must have ridden that thing like the Pony Express. It should be in the Smithsonian somewhere.

[found footage fest via BuzzFeed]

Jeopardy! (ABC) — It’s on at 7:00 p.m. in New York, which is annoying because it plays opposite the “Simpsons” re-runs on Fox. And oh yeah: this video blew my mind. (via Buzzfeed)

The Jeff Dunham Show (Comedy Central) — I thought it seemed a little bit insane to give a ventriloquist a half-hour show, but I thought, Hey, don’t be too quick to judge — this could be almost as good as “Krod Mandoon.” But then the reviews came in, and it’s a complete train wreck. (Also: Dunham’s kind of a dick.) UPDATE: It’s not on until tomorrow night. You have a reprieve.

America’s Next Top Model (CW) — Kim Kardashian is the guest judge, so there’ll be no shortage of pleasant, humble, self-effacing women on this episode.

Mercy (NBC) — The main character is an Iraq veteran nurse with a drinking problem and a lousy relationship. Is that a crappy enough life for you, Maria Shriver?

Glee (Fox) — I gave up on “Glee” a week or two ago. It’s not that it’s bad; it just doesn’t fit in with my tastes. I go for slow-burning story lines in shows like “Mad Men” and “The Wire,” and “Glee” just moves too fast for me. Every week there was a new revelation of a pregnancy or an engagement — the kind of audience-catching twists that feel like desperation moves. Much like the locker room in a West Village gym, “Glee” is just a little too soapy and gay for me.

Lock n’ Load (Showtime) — Series premiere. I haven’t heard much about this, but it’s a documentary series that looks at a Colorado gun shop and the people who buy firearms there. Sigh… makes me miss my .50 cal. Blowing up trucks and artillery pieces just isn’t the same without it.