Have you ever wanted to try Apple Jack’s made with single malt scotch? Or Fruity Paintballs with the sweet artificial flavor of chicken fingers? Or Tobias Funke’s blue balls? Now you can, and if you act now, Ron Swanson’s Bacon n’ Eggs Cereal comes with a free copy of Be a Man: The Pawnee Rangers Handbook.
Tim Doyle is an Austin-based illustrator and print-maker. For an exhibition entitled “Unreal Estate” that opens today at Spoke Art in San Francisco, he recreated some of TV’s most memorable fictional settings, from Moe’s Tavern to Satriale’s Pork Store. And by recreate, I mean he made them kind of terrifying, or in artist speak:
“Unreal Estate” is a collection of locations that many of us know and have been to on a weekly basis at times, but can never actually visit. These places are in our memories transmitted and entrenched there through a cathode-ray tube. Some of us have been going to these places for decades, some of these places were taken from us, way too soon. (Spoke Art)
As someone who goes out of his way to visit pop culture locations, I really like Daly’s work, and he does a nice job of getting the little details right, like the car outside of Monk’s with the ASSMAN license plate. That being said, I’m really glad he only did three Springfield locations — looking at his vision of Uncle Moe’s Family Feedbag would make me not believe in sunshine and puppy dogs anymore. Take a look at some of his work.
I don’t really understand fingernail art. To be honest, it kind of skeeves me out. It’s unnatural; there’s something strangely Wicca about it. Maybe it’s just me, but the idea of spending $100 on something that might break off in your boyfriend’s clavicle next week gives me the heebs. But when the fingernail art is inspired by TV shows, it makes me slightly less squeamish, especially when those television shows are as awesome as these are (I’m particularly fond of the “Doctor Who” art).
Most of the images in the following gallery came from Flavorwire’s collection (and you can see there entire post, which includes a lot of not-awesome shows like “Glee”), but where indicated, the fingernail art comes from elsewhere. Also, yes: I searched all morning for Greendale fingernail art, but the Internet let me down on this one.
Her.
Earlier today, Donald Trump unveiled the 18 contestants for the fifth season of “The Celebrity Apprentice,” which premieres on NBC on February 12. Here they are, ranked by their current cultural relevance.
Relevant: Michael Andretti (cars and stuff); Adam Carolla (unfortunately means Bill Simmons will write a 17,000 word essay comparing this season to the first :17 seconds of Hoosiers); Lou Ferrigno (THE HULK); George Takei (Sulu/gay rights activist); Paul Teutul, Sr. (like Clay Morrow but real); and Patricia Velásquez (second Marta on “Arrested Development”).
Once Relevant: Tia Carrere (all downhill since Wayne’s World 2); Arsenio Hall (will the Trump WHOOP?); Lisa Lampanelli (“…something something black guys!”); Dayana Mendoza (psh, former Miss Universe); and Cheryl Tiegs (her SI Swimsuit Issue covers helped a lot of guys get through high school in the 1970s).
And here’s a bunch of “celebrities” who never mattered, ever: Clay Aiken (best known for being named “Clay Aiken”); Debbie Gibson (Tiffany’s better); Teresa Giudice (Housewife of Jersey who looks anything but real); Victoria Gotti (Hot Italian Dish author); Penn Jillette (loud magician); Dee Snider (Twisted Sister: awful band or MOST awful band?); and Girl from Danity Kane. And the Trump himself.
Comedian Patrice O’Neal died last night, one month after suffering a massive stroke. The longtime Comedy Central presence had previously battled diabetes, which served as the butt of several jokes in his final TV appearance, the roast of Charlie Sheen. He was 41.
O’Neal’s TV credits included a stint on “The Office,” regular appearances on “Tough Crowd with Colin Quinn,” and a memorable one-off as the pyromaniac T-Bone in “Arrested Development” (There’s always money in the banana stand). He was also the second-best part about In the Cut (banner image & video below), which reminds me: R.I.P. Meg Ryan’s original face.
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