I don't do Photoshop. Instead, please accept this picture I drew of a bunny wearing sunglasses.

Good morning, y’all. I didn’t get to make a proper announcement yesterday about guest editing for Matt while he’s on vacation because I was away all day. Then again, I managed to work in lots of jokes about hitting Kate Gosselin in the face with a pie, about a dozen GIFs of Kelly Kapowski, and an unnecessary cheap shot at the New York Mets. I don’t think I could have summed it up any better than that. We cool? Awesome. Lotsa links comin’.

As mentioned above. Here is the post from yesterday about Leah Remini that I tacked a crapload of Kelly Kapowski GIFs onto because… well, because. However, lady commenter Smello rightfully pointed out that I didn’t include a SINGLE cheesecake photo of Zack Morris, thus neglecting WG’s female readers. So I woke up extra early today, Googled “Mark-Paul Gosselaar butt” and tracked down this NSFW link from “Franklin & Bash.” I love ya, ladies. [Warming Glow]

I love Joel McHale, too. Here’s an interview from Vulture with Joel McHale from “Community” and “The Soup.” Stupid sexy McHale and his super quick wit. [Vulture]

Good. Plenty more time for… uh, flashing? I have no idea what else this girl does. Noted teenage raccoon and former “Gossip Girl” actress Taylor Momsen has quit acting. I, for one, weep for the arts. [Vulture]

Yes, please. Cartoon Network has renewed “Children’s Hospital” for a fourth season. In all seriousness, I can’t recommend this show enough. In somewhat less seriousness, fartspooplolzomg. [Deadline]

Read the first sentence of this story. Best show ever? Best show ever. ABC Family is developing an American version of “Terminales,” a Mexican drama about a woman with cancer. [Deadline]

After the jump, some Uproxx and web familia links, and a couple GIFs of Aziz Ansari from “Parks & Rec.”

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I had originally planned to post the first tease of “Mad Men” Season 5 this morning, but that video was a load of crap: no new footage, just a list of accolades and the promise of its return in 2012. Screw that.

Instead, here’s the video for “Otis,” the first track off of Jay-Z and Kanye West’s collaboration Watch the Throne. The video (embedded below) was directed by Spike Jonze and features a brief but delightful cameo from Aziz Ansari of “Parks and Recreation.” Given that this week’s stock market tumble just guaranteed that my children will have to forego school to start working in factories at age 5, I suppose I could be offended by two extremely wealthy people rapping about having extra Mercedes and flying in private jets.

And yet… nope. I dig it all. I dig the Otis Redding sample; I dig the big American flag on the hangar; I dig the chopped up, flame-spurting Maybach (which will be auctioned for charity); I dig the white girls riding in it; and yeah, I dig Aziz — who seems to be in character as Tom Haverford — just kinda hanging out in the background and dancing through the video every now and then. I miss music videos being on television.

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Funny or Die, as the Internet’s YouTube service for famous people, has a lot more “Die” than “Funny.” But this promo skit for “Parks and Recreation” — in which a foul-mouthed Rob Lowe goes off on the rest of the cast when he learns he hasn’t been on television in five months — is absolutely terrific. Watch the video:

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HAHA UR DOIN SEX BACKWARDS

NBC has released a four-minute, behind the scenes teaser for the upcoming season of “Parks & Recreation,” and let me be the first (technically, not anywhere near the first — but you can technically kiss my butt) to say THANK GOD.  Don’t get me wrong, the teaser isn’t super-hilarious or anything, but it is a sign that we are ever closer to the show returning to its rightful place in NBC’s Thursday night lineup.  As you may remember, it was bumped to midseason in favor of the zany and original gee-aren’t-other-cultures-with-accents-and-sometimes-white-people-but-mostly-foreigners-HILARIOUS comedy “Outsourced.”

Well, now it’s coming back as part of NBC’s new three our comedy block, and it’s got a plum spot at 9:30, right behind “The Office.”  I can’t wait.  Last season, I had it on my short list of enjoyable network comedies, along with “Community” and “Modern Family.” And unlike those shows there’s hardly any gratuitous jiggling involved, so you know it had to be good to make my list anyway.

Three quick thoughts about the teaser:

1. Aziz Ansari telling the Foot Locker manager to suck it cracked me up.
2. Nick Offerman’s character, Ron Swanson makes by far the best facial expression on TV.
3. Good Lord, Rashida Jones and Rob Lowe are attractive people.  I’m not advocating forced breeding, but there should be a law that they have to have a bunch of kids just to even out damage being done by ugly people having multiples every other week on TLC.  Wait, maybe I am advocating forced breeding.  I regret nothing.

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The NBA Finals, the Stanley Cup Finals, “Breaking Bad,” and “Treme” were all on TV at the same time last night, but the MTV Movie Awards overshadowed the quality programming with its usual combination of glitz, buzzy moments, and the awful pop cultural tastes of teenagers. Here’s some of the stuff that I caught between flipping between the NBA Finals and “Breaking Bad” (which, as usual, was UNSANE)…

• Aziz Ansari was okay as the host. I dunno, he did a little bit of stand-up at the beginning and then I didn’t see him again.
• Sandra Bullock got some B.S. “Generation Award” so she could make her triumphant public appearance and get past the Jesse James stuff. And she capped it off by kissing Scarlett Johansson. That’s how I get over break-ups, too. “Hey, ScarJo? Me again. Mind coming over and mending this broken heart?” (video below)
• Katy Perry sang an absolutely horrible song about California. Like, Ke$ha-awful. But she wore a blue wig and had her giant cans on display, so I’m inclined to let it slide. (more pics at WWTDD)
• The big opening number was Tom Cruise, reprising a supporting character from 2008, dancing with Jennifer Lopez. Truly a cool thing to see if it was 12 years ago instead of 2010.

Oh yeah, and Twilight won for pretty much everything, except best villain. I know what you’re thinking: that went to Christoph Waltz in Inglorious Basterds, right? Nope. Surely Ken Jeong in The Hangover, then? Oh no, it was Tom Felton for Harry Potter and the Adjective Noun. His turn as Draco Malfoy truly was a timeless performance. It was haunting, really. I’ve never been so terrified of a 20-year-old British kid with bleached blond hair. Great call on that one, teenagers.
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