That acronym in the headline is short for “What Would Japanese Chimp Do?” If you guessed “fondle an attractive woman on TV,” you win the Recognizing Japan Is Always and Will Forever Be F’d Up contest. First prize is a pair of freshly-worn Hello Kitty panties.

[Buzzfeed]

As if PETA wasn’t already getting in the way of me enjoying things like the delicious taste of tortured animals and the exhilaration of gambling on a dogfight, now they’re trying to prevent chimpanzees from working in Hollywood. In fact, the Anjelica Huston video above is part of a PETA push that made ABC decide to not use a chimp as a guest judge on “Dancing with the Stars,” which, let’s face it, would have been awesome.

PETA cited concerns about how great apes are separated from their mothers, beaten and shocked in training, and discarded once they become too large to handle safely [much like Michael Jackson - Ed.]…

["DWTS" exec producer Conrad] Green e-mailed PETA to say that he would re-cut Tuesday night’s segment and remove the chimpanzee and he vowed that he will never again use chimpanzees in his productions…

Green aired the segment sans chimp -– having replaced the chimp with a toddler. [LA Times]

I dunno. Toddlers aren’t nearly as funny apes, but I guess I’m okay with it. As long as the toddler was removed from his mother and beaten and shocked during training.