Recurring characters are like inside jokes: They exist in part to reward viewers of television series, not just the episodes. They’re like drunk uncles or ex-girlfriends who drop by every few months, drink all your beer, dance naked in your living room, puke on the floor and vanish, only to return again six months later looking to crash on your couch. And we let them, goddamnit, because we have an unyielding affection for them, no matter how much they wreck the place.

The best shows use these recurring characters sparingly. They’re typically one note, but it’s a glorious note, and as long as it’s not overplayed, the character can continue to return without ever wearing out his or her welcome (see, e.g., Senor Chang, who was elevated to series regular on “Community” and almost immediately became unbearable).

I’ve taken the liberty of ranking, without comment, television’s best recurring characters. A note about the criteria: To be included on the list, the character must be in an on-going television show; he or she must have been in fewer than 30 percent of the show’s episodes; and he or she must have recurred in two or more seasons of the show. Limit one recurring character per series.

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Breaking Bad (AMC, Sunday) – I recently made a declaration that I will get all caught up on the entire run of this show by the end of the year. I believe this means, by law, that no one can yell at me about not watching it now.

Curb Your Enthusiasm/Entourage (HBO, Sunday) – It must be liberating for Larry David to know that, no matter how despicable and insensitive he acts on his show, he’s still not the biggest dick in HBO’s Sunday night lineup.

Karaoke Battle (ABC, Friday) – As far as I can tell, the only difference between this show and “American Idol” is that the contestants didn’t bother to learn the words first. Groundbreaking. Hey, at least we know they can read, right?

Heat Seekers (Food Network, Friday) – A show where a couple guys travel around the country and eat spicy food? I like my version of this show better.

Same Name (CBS, Sunday) – New Miami Dolphin Reggie Bush trades places with a farm owner with the same name. My prediction: he will plant awesome seeds, but the harvest will never live up to its potential. Also, the harvest will have to give back its Heisman trophy. I’m bad at analogies.

Leverage (TNT, Sunday) – This show just got renewed for a fifth season. FIVE. Who is watching “Leverage”? If I’m George Lopez right now, this news makes me furious. Also, if I was George Lopez, I’d make a pretty crappy joke about it, then try to throw it to my band, then realize I don’t have a band anymore, then get MORE furious. I’d be an angry George Lopez.

After the jump, a GIF of kitties playing the keyboard. I don’t believe that needs any more explanation.

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While “Curb Your Enthusiasm” has never appealed to me, I appreciate the way Larry David is unafraid to get laughs out of the most taboo topics, as evidenced by this scene from last night’s episode, when Larry meets a Palestinian woman named Shara (Canadian actress Anne Bedian) who shouts anti-Semitic slurs at him during their sexual encounter. It’s something that would both turn me on and make me laugh if Larry David weren’t in the picture. Still, as racist sex scenes go, this one’s a lot better than Selma Blair’s in Storytelling.

Curb Your Enthusiasm (HBO, Sunday) – The Season 8 premiere sees the show shifting from LA to New York. I used to really like this show, but I’ve kind of grown away from it. If I wanted to feel uncomfortable all the time, I could just tell everyone I meet that I’m a blogger.

True Blood (HBO, Sunday) – I said this on Twitter a while back, but I’d be much more inclined to watch this show if it featured Wesley Snipes hunting vampires with a giant sword and was called “Blade: Louisiana.”

Comedy Central Presents: Mitch Hedberg (Comedy Central, Friday) – Tonight at 10:00. Watch this, record this, or feel guilty about missing it, or we can’t be friends.

Torchwood: Miracle Day (Starz, Friday) – A reboot of the BBC sci-fi series that was spun off from “Doctor Who.” Or something. My brain does this thing were it shuts itself off after reading phrases like “BBC sci-fi series.” I think it’s a defense mechanism to prevent predators from shoving me in a locker.

Drop Dead Diva (Lifetime, Sunday) – So help me God, this is the actual first sentence of the TV Guide description of this episode: “Jane represents the mother of a dwarf in a case against a sperm bank as she awaits a post-date phone call from Dr. Bill.” Holy moly. Big day for Jane.

Secrets of Seal Team Six (Discovery, Sunday) – Secret #1: Every other Friday they have margarita parties! Wait. No, that’s Franklin & Bash. I’m always getting those two mixed up.

Leverage/Falling Skies (Sunday, TNT) – I have absolutely nothing to say about these shows so here is a note I wrote to Pippa Middleton. Pass it along.

After the jump, the music video for “My Lovin’ (You’re Never Gonna Get It)” by En Vogue, because I watch a lot of the VH1 Soul channel and I don’t have to explain myself to you people anyway.

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Ever since 1965, when theatre critic/known sado-masochist Kenneth Tynan uttered the word “f**k” on “BBC-3,” one of George Carlin’s seven words you can’t say on TV has been, well, said on TV. It’s an easy word to overuse, and it’s only used effectively in two situations: 1) in an unexpected live moment, and 2) by skilled professionals. My current favorite cuss artist is Susie Greene on “Curb Your Enthusiasm,” which returns to HBO this Sunday for its eighth and possibly final season. Played by Susie Essman, Greene has unleashed numerous toxic tirades at her “fat f**k” husband, Jeff, and his “four-eyed f**k” client, Larry David, since the show began in 2000. In honor of Susie, and for all those who don’t mind dropping an F-bomb (I’m sorry for using that phrase, I really am) every so often — or constantly if you’re on one BBC comedy — here are ten great moments of the F-word on TV.

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