So, the thing about TV news that breaks after 2 p.m. on a Friday: you’ll probably have to wait until Monday to read our reaction to it, even when it’s about “Community.” It’s a scheduling thing blah blah blah. So, to apologize for our tardiness, we’ve sorted through all the hundreds of masturbatory quotes and inane talking points from this year’s Television Critics Association (Fox and NBC so far, everything else forthcoming) to give you only the tidbits that matter. Also, to sweeten the deal, there’s a reactionary GIF for every item.

Also, quite possibly the least funny show on TV was canceled, so yay!

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Entertainment Weekly has ratings for the most and least watched TV shows of the fall, and good news for “Community” fans: It’s not the lowest rated. In fact, if you take out CW shows because they obviously don’t count, and if you discount airings of shows out of their regular time slots, then “Community” is actually only the sixth least watched show of the fall behind “Bob’s Burgers,” “Chuck,” “Rock City,” “Fringe,” and “Free Agents.” Granted, one of those shows has been cancelled, and two others are on their way out, but still. It’s not the worst! In fact, according to TVBytheNumbers, “Community” actually has a good chance at being renewed for a fourth season, even if it does rank below “COPS.”

As for the highest rated shows: The usual array of TV programs that most of you probably don’t watch, save for “Modern Family” and football: CBS procedurals, CBS comedies, and reality competitions. As the adage goes: “Old people love bad TV.” The highest rated new shows of the fall were “Two Broke Girls,” “Unforgettable,” “Persons of Interest,” all on CBS, and “Once Upon a Time” on ABC. Not a lot of fall hits on the networks.

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Hell On Wheels/Walking Dead (AMC, Sunday) – I completely missed the premiere of “Hell on Wheels” in last week’s Weekend Preview. My apologies. I went back and watched it On Demand during the week and I have three thoughts to share: 1) If this show interests you and you haven’t seen “Deadwood” yet, take the hour every week you would dedicate to this show and watch that instead. 2) If you saw the movie Crossroads starring Britney Spears (three times), you may have a hard time taking leading man Anson Mount seriously as a badass gunslinger. Not his fault, just a fact. 3) While doing an image search to run with this post, I stumbled across the picture to the right. I have been fascinated by it ever since.

Fringe (FOX, Friday) – I also upset people last week by comparing this show to “Chuck.” I meant in the whole “a rapid fanbase saves it despite the show being banished to Friday nights” way, but I got YELLED AT before I clarified that. Yeesh.

Boss (Starz, Friday) – The guys at ModernMan.com have been doing a “Boss” giveaway every week, and the prize this time is a $1,000 AmEx gift card. One thousand dollars?! For watchin’ the teevee?! What is this, soshalism?! (Details here.)

Saturday Night Live (NBC, Saturday) – Hosted by Emma Stone. Easy A was a great movie. You should see it.

The Simpsons (FOX, Sunday) – This is their fairly-hyped foodie episode. If this doesn’t result in Kurp eating something disgusting for our enjoyment, I’ll be incredibly disappointed.

Dexter/Homeland (Showtime, Sunday) – I have never in my entire life had Showtime. I’ve heard both of these shows are good. You are incredibly welcome for this thought-provoking analysis.

Lots of Other Stuff (Every channel, All weekend) – Sunday especially is jam-packed. I didn’t even get to good shows like “The Good Wife” and “Boardwalk Empire,” or the other crappy shows I’d like to make fun of here. For example, did you know “Desperate Housewives” is still on the air? I was BLOWN AWAY when I saw that. I thought for sure it got canceled in, like, 2004.

You nerds asked for more “Fringe” coverage, so here it is. In order to get you excited for tonight’s episode, I recruited a couple of big-time “Fringe” geeks to talk about their favorite (and least favorite) moments from the first three episodes this season.

October: Hello. We are the observers. I am October and this is my collaborator, March. While we do have similar haircuts, we often see the events that unfold in “Fringe” completely differently. We hope you enjoy our combined report. Here are some of our favorite moments from the first three episodes. More reports to follow.

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Below is a new teaser for the coming season of “Fringe,” which will debut on September 23rd after miraculously surviving a move to Friday nights last season. The new footage that gets presented hints that Olivia feels a hole in her life where Peter Bishop used to be.

At least, that’s what I’ve gleaned from reading other sites’ write-ups for this teaser. I’m sorry to say that I know very little about “Fringe,” and it’s probably going to stay that way — after all, I never liked “The X Files,” and I just barely tolerated “Lost,” so I don’t think this is the show for me. But I understand and respect the cult appeal of “Fringe,” and I particularly appreciate that it looks way less gay than “Doctor Who,” so you genre fans can go ahead and geek out. I’ll leave the room to look for new corgi videos while you discuss plot points.

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