Community (NBC) — Hilary Duff guest stars in a Mean Girls-like episode that also features Pierce (Chevy Chase) getting hurt on a trampoline. Oh, and in case you were curious: last week, in the 8:30 spot with a strong lead-in, “Community” actually got good ratings. What a surprise.

The Big Bang Theory (CBS) — Squaring off against “Community,” “BBT” answers with a sexy guest star of its own: geek goddess Eliza Dushku.

It’s Always Sunny in Philadelphia (FX) — I’m woefully behind on this season. I have a bad habit of trying to have a social life on Thursday nights, then coming home and only watching “Community” before going to bed, leaving a couple hours’ worth of new TV unwatched on my DVR. But hey, you want a full-time TV reviewer, you gotta pay full-time reviewer money. My bank account says I’m only getting blogger dollars*. (*minimum wage + Camel Cash)

Bones (Fox) — “So You Think You Can Dance” star Stephen “tWitch” Boss guest stars to help dumb down the credits.

CSI: Original Flavor (CBS) — Larry Fishburne and the CSIs investigate a murder in which the body has been shredded to bits. “And I guess that was your accomplice in the wood chipper.”

Here’s all the action that “Gossip Girl” had to offer for the much-hyped threesome. Although there were public outcries and demands that the episode be an hour-long hardcore scene with Blake Lively, Leighton Meester, and myself, the principals involved here are Dan, Hilary Duff’s Olivia, and the other chick. Whatsherface. Vanessa. Apparently this makeout scene was followed by a shot of all three of them asleep in bed together, exhausted from a pillow fight or something.

I’d like to say I’m disappointed by this, but that would infer that I had some sort of expectations to begin with. If anything, the awkwardness leading up to it is frighteningly real for a college threesome. As the guy you don’t want to push anything and mess it all up, but you don’t know what the right move is, and you just kinda hope that the girls are drunk enough and willing to make out with each other… is what I imagine it would be like. I’ve never kissed two girls at once. I’ve only kissed one girl, ever. (My mom!)

[Flavorwire via Buzzfeed]

Hey everybody, big news!  A former teen starlet you don’t really care about is joining a show you don’t watch!  Get ready for Hilary Duff to join the cast of “Gossip Girl”!  OMG I can’t wait!

The actress-designer-pop chanteuse will play Olivia Burke, a movie star who enrolls at NYU in search of a traditional college experience. She ends up rooming with Vanessa (Jessica Szohr) so it’s safe to say she’ll be majoring in Drama! [LOL! -Ed.]

Awww, it’s so cute when acting lightweights like the guy from “Entourage” (Adrienne something?) and Hilary Duff get cast as big-time movie stars.  Look at the small-time actor pretending to big-time!  You’re so cute!  Yes you are!  Mommy, can I keep it?  “No, honey.  They make terrible pets.  They’re self-absorbed and rarely house-trained.”

Hilary Duff will be in an upcoming episode of “Law & Order: SVU,” also known as “Law & Order: The One with Sex Crimes and Ice-T.”  Just Jared pulled several photos from Duff on the East Village set Monday, as well as this description:

The Duffster plays Ashlee Walker, a “rebellious, trashy, slutty, irresponsible young mother” who is suspected of murdering her baby Sierra. The script even reveals that she will be wearing a wet T-shirt and shown “drunk and partying in Cabo!”

Sounds like the perfect girl.  Trashy, slutty, irresponsible, drunk, wears a wet t-shirt.  Hey, and she doesn’t like kids, either!  We’d get along great!