I got those bitches a Holocaust. Bitches love Holocausts.

Hitler’s Suicide Ship (National Geographic) — Now that History has abandoned its 24/7 Hitler coverage, NatGeo steps in with this special, followed by Hunting Hitler’s Generals. Hmmmm… sounds good, but is there Hitler-punching?

Extreme Makeover: Weight Loss Edition (ABC) — Season finale. Chris tries to whip a super-fat mom (445 pounds) into shape for the Disneyland Marathon. No other marathon would do, because no other marathon advertises the properties of ABC’s owners.

Anthony Bourdain: No Reservations (Travel) — Bourdain goes to Naples, where I can only hope that everyone he meets speaks in stereotypically broken English. “Antonio! Come-a eat-a dis pizza pie!”

Warehouse 13/Alphas (Syfy) — Some geek-ass commenter always chimes in with the Syfy shows when I don’t mention them. So here they are.

The Bachelorette (ABC) — Last week, Ashley eliminated Ames, the guy who was CLEARLY gay. Yes, I watched it with my girlfriend. And as much of a time-wasting farce as the “Bachelor/Bachelorette” franchise is, I actually kind of enjoy watching it if I have an audience to hear me make fun of the show. Because it’s all about me.

It’s been a while since we’ve had a good Forgotten Classic, and this one is a doozy: “Heil Honey I’m Home,” a British sitcom meant to spoof American sitcoms of the 1950s. It was canceled after a single episode in 1990. Hmmm, I wonder why…

The show centres on fictionalised versions of Adolf Hitler and Eva Braun, who live next door to a Jewish couple, Arny and Rosa Goldenstein. The show’s plot is centred on Hitler’s inability to get along with his neighbours. [Wiki]

WOW. Don’t get me wrong, I think Holocaust jokes are a real gas. They’re fun to cook up, but I’m writing for a small audience that understands I’m not anti-Semitic. (Or my audience is REALLY anti-Semitic.) But the point is: TOO SOON, man. Too soon. Keep this video in your hip pocket the next time some pretentious twat tries to tell you how much better British shows are than American ones.

(Fun fact: In the clip above, Eva mentions the name Klaus Katzenjammer. Katzenjammer is a German word that translates loosely to “hangover.” Thanks, Word of the Day!)

[omarcustv via BadtvBlog]

If you follow Warming Glow on a regular basis, you know that I’ve been excited about the arrival of History’s “WWII in HD” for months. Well, the ten-hour, five-night event finally begins on Sunday night, and here, again, is the goosebump-inducing trailer, which gives you glimpses of the crystal-clear footage of a war only ever seen in grainy black-and-white. If that’s not enough to convince you to watch, check out the LA Times’s review:

I know film purists are supposed to eschew such tinkerings [with the original footage], but for the most part the various refurbs are almost disturbingly effective. Hitler never looked so human, Allied and Axis soldiers alike appear woefully young and grubby, and you’ve never seen a battleship blown up until you’ve seen it in HD.

F-CK AND YES. But wait! There’s more! After the jump I’ve got preview clips of the documentary miniseries’ coverage of Iwo Jima and Okinawa that are so good your brain will turn off the blinking function in your eyes. God I can’t wait for this.

Read the rest of this entry »

I need that ring tone: A collection of commercials from Australia’s Hahn Super Dry beer.  If more commercials used the word “titties,” maybe I wouldn’t fast-forward through them so much.  [Gunaxin]

‘It can make an eagle make love to a bear’: The song that Will Ferrell was supposed to sing on the American Idol finale really is the best song ever written.  [Funny or Die]

Spoiler alert: it’s gonna kick ass: An in-depth review of the pilot for “V.”  I can’t wait stupid summer to be over so I can watch new TV shows.  Those three months of enjoying the weather outside and showing off my abs at the beach are always so tedious.  Yes, I work out.  Try not to stare, ladies.  [Televisionary]

I wanna be this guy’s friend: “Fond du Lac police continue a fruitless search for a man wearing an ape costume who has attempted to steal foam banana displays from inside local gas stations.” [JS Online]

Really? I kinda want a celebrity butt plug. Five sex products that allegedly shouldn’t exist.  I disagree.  [Banned in Hollywood]

We’re gonna need some more eyeliner: The CW is pairing “Supernatural” with “The Vampire Diaries” (or as I call it, “VD”) and promoting it with the tag line “Thursdays Go Goth.”  Half-price razor blades all night, fat chicks get in free.  [Sci Fi Wire]

If I could punch this video, I would: Spencer Pratt is apparently in a posse of some sort. [In Game Now]

(image via Blog of Hilarity)