The Television Critics Association (TCA) presented its annual awards on Saturday night, and while I don’t find the winners to be as refreshing as the TCA’s list of nominees, TV critics are still 800 times better than the collection of mongoloids and zoo animals who vote for the Emmys.

“Mad Men” and “Modern Family” were recognized as the best drama and comedy, respectively, while “Friday Night Lights” got a victory lap as Program of the Year. Also, since the TCAs don’t have separate awards for actors and actresses, Jon Hamm’s win for Individual Achievment in Drama came at the hands of Julianna Margulies (“The Good Wife”) and Margo Martindale (“Justified”) — as well as Steve Buscemi (“Boardwalk Empire”), Peter Dinklage (“Game of Thrones”), and Timothy Olyphant (“Justified”). Ty Burrell and TCA host Nick Offerman shared the award for Individual Achievement in Comedy, proof that ”Modern Family,” despite its excellence, is officially overrated. Sorry, but Ron Swanson shouldn’t have to share awards any sooner than he’d share his personal time with co-workers or his paycheck with the government.

Full list of awards below.

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Excellent news: Jon Hamm has signed a three-year contract with Lionsgate TV and AMC that locks him in to play Don Draper through Season 7 of “Mad Men.”

We hear Hamm’s blockbuster new three-year deal is in the eight figures, catapulting him in the top ranks of cable’s leading men. His previous contract for Mad Men was for two more seasons… Its length now aligns it with the one of Mad Men creator Matthew Weiner, who closed a new three-year deal with Lionsgate TV and AMC earlier this year. After locking in Weiner, Hamm was the studio’s top priority, with othe r key cast members also expected to get bumps in exchange for longer contracts. [Deadline]

Pffft, whatever. Eight figures over three years isn’t all that much. I’ll make eight figures over the next three years, too. I just have to count the two zeroes after the decimal point.

No word yet on whether Hamm made any character demands in the new contract, but he’s certainly a big enough star to do so. As the series gets closer to the ’70s and the fashion trends change, he should ensure that Draper’s suits remain dark gray with skinny ties. I also would have demanded at least one forceful fingerbang per season.

The extended delay between “Mad Men” seasons is already starting to get to me. I’m so used to my summer television watching being full of casual alcohol abuse and manliness that I can feel the withdrawal setting in. So when there’s “Mad Men” news to discuss, I’m gonna jump at it. And the recent announcement that Jon Hamm, Don Draper himself, is directing the season premiere… well that qualifies.

The idea to follow in the footsteps of co-star John Slattery and helm an episode of the acclaimed AMC hit has been “in the back of my mind” for a while now,” says Hamm. “It helps to have people you know and trust surrounding you. We’ve been fortunate enough to have very little turnover not only in our cast but in our crew.”

“I watched Slattery do it, and he handled it with such grace and ability and ease,” he continues, before adding with a laugh, “I figured if he can do it, s–t, I can do it too.”

Hey, Hamm. Cool it. What, the acting and SNL hosting and looking great in a suit and giving awesome quotes to reporters like that one wasn’t enough for you? Now you’ve got to direct, too? Come on, guy. You’re giving me a complex.

I’ll tell you what, let’s you and me make you a deal. You can go ahead and direct the season premiere of “Mad Men” on one condition: kill Timberlake. Now, I’ve got nothing against the kid personally. I kinda like him, actually. I just can’t have TWO handsome, infuriatingly talented guys running around out there. It simply won’t do. So look, production starts on “Mad Men” in August. That gives you a full summer to take care of this. That’s plenty of time. Maybe you could pull a Wile E. Coyote and paint a giant vagina on the side of a mountain and hope he just smashes into face first or something. I’m just spitballing here, it’s totally your call.

What’s important here is this: in the end, there can be only one.

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Once a fixture of “Saturday Night Live,” we haven’t seen much of The Ambiguously Gay Duo — Robert Smigel’s innuendo-heavy cartoon — since Steve Carell and Stephen Colbert (who voice the skits) attained comedic superstardom. But Ace and Gary returned in a big way during this weekend’s “SNL,” an otherwise unremarkable episode hosted by Ed Helms. Thanks to a “flesh ray,” Ace and Gary become live-action heroes played by Jon Hamm and Jimmy Fallon, while Carell, Colbert, and Helms play the bad guys trying to out them (for what it’s worth, Fred Armisen plays the lizard guy).

You can watch the Hulu video below — unless you live outside of the United States, of course. Consider it your punishment for daring to live outside our borders, you commie scum. (Just kidding, foreigners: you can watch the live-action part of the sketch here.)

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Community (NBC) — Season finale (part 2). A running joke this season has been Abed’s love of “Cougar Town,” a gag that may be a response to “Cougar Town’s” Travis forcing his girlfriend to watch the Season 1 DVD of “Community.” Tonight we get a little crossover, as you can clearly see the ABC show’s Busy Phillips (in red) and Dan Byrd (between Donald Glover and Danny Pudi) in the background of this publicity still.

Vampire Diaries (CW) — Season finale. Apparently last week there was a big bloodbath that killed off a lot of characters. Sweet! Tune in tonight for dénouement!

CSI: Original Flavor (CBS) — Season finale. I don’t have anything to say about this, I just felt compelled to include it because it’s the season finale.

Parks and Recreation (NBC) — WOOOO, back-to-back episodes!!!! Leslie Knope & Co. get new episodes at both 9:30 and 10 p.m. on the East coast, with the latter episode featuring Ron Swanson as a mentor to grade schoolers. After all, every child needs to learn the Pyramid of Greatness.

American Idol (Fox) — Former winner Jordin Sparks performs on the results show. I need her to get a little fatter so I can call her “Jordin Sporks.”

LATE NIGHT GUESTS: Jim Parsons on Letterman; Ann Curry and Norm MacDonals on Leno; Kate Hudson on Kimmel; Mary Lynn Rajskub on Ferguson; Maya Rudolph, Nick Offerman (SWANSON!), and Lauryn Hill on Fallon; Kristen Wiig on “The Daily Show;” and Magic Johnson and Maggie Q on Conan. For those who missed last night’s “Conan,” here’s Jon Hamm winking at you:

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