FX has teamed up with Matthew McConaughey’s production company, J.K. Livin, for a new comedy project. POP QUIZ! Of the following laid-back terms terms, which one will appear in the blockquote below? (A) Carefree. (B) Free-loving. (C) Free spirit. (D) Freebird.

Tentatively titled Kick Ass Militia, the single-camera comedy is based on source material by JR Reed, an old friend of McConaughey’s. It centers on two brothers whose divergent views are always pitting them against each other on their Malibu compound– one a survivalist and one a free-loving cult leader. ["That's right, man, just a couple of brothers chillin' on the beach, and one of 'em's always harshin' the other's buzz. To comedic effect, of course."] Marc Hyman is writing the script and is executive producing Militia, now in development, with McConaughey. [Deadline]

The correct answer is (B); however, the judges also would have accepted a drawn-out fart noise in conjunction with a wanking motion.

Babies make people boring.   Matthew McConaughey was on Leno last night, and it was all “Levi this” and “Levi that” and stories about changing diapers and the faces that 8-month-olds make.  It was a grinding bore.  Man, there was a time when McConaughey still cared about livin’ — L-I-V-I-N — a time when he wasn’t afraid to get higher than a Winehouse kite, then go on “The Daily Show” and act out goats having sex.

This clip, amazingly, is from January 2001.  Crazy.  I don’t think the Internet was even around back then.  Or at least it wasn’t on people’s phones.  What happened?  Why did everyone stop getting high and telling goat sex stories on TV?  I blame the terrorists.  After 9/11, goat snowballing just seemed so frivolous.