Note: in the past hour or so, news has been spreading like Lannister wild fire that “Parks and Recreation” and “Community” will get abbreviated seasons, then be canceled. It’s not true. It’s based on an unofficial report that we wrote about earlier this week, and shouldn’t be believed. That being said:

Parks and Recreation (NBC, 9:30 p.m.) – Season finale. CAN’T NBC JUST TELL US IF “PARKS” AND “COMMUNITY” ARE COMING BACK NEXT SEASON, OR AT LEAST FOR HOW LONG? I’m not emotionally prepared to say goodbye to either (a.k.a. need more booze and waffles). Anyway, tonight’s episode has the Parks gang pondering their futures while awaiting the Leslie v. Bobby election results. Meta.

Community (NBC, 8 p.m.) – Abed sees a therapist (John Hodgman) because he’s not convinced that the Fake Dean is the Real Dean. Which he’s not, because he’s the Fake Dean.

Beastie Boys: Solid Gold Hits (Fuse, 8:30 p.m.) – A tribute to MCA, featuring clips from the best Beastie Boys’ music videos. This special could be nine hours long and I’d happily watch every minute.

30 Rock (NBC, 8:30 p.m.) – Season finale. Avery (Elizabeth Banks) returns from North Korea in a story you never really cared about, because who pays attention to “30 Rock” season-long arcs? Besides that guy who’s writing the Unauthorized Oral History of Lutz. He does. [UPDATE: Just renewed for a seventh and final season. More tomorrow]

The Office (NBC, 9 p.m.) – Season finale. Andy goes undercover as a janitor to stage a coup and a “stolen diaper leads to a high-speed car chase,” according to the episode synopsis. STOLEN. DIAPER. I wish this was the show’s final episode: a story about poop seems a particulary apt metaphor.

LATE NIGHT GUESTS: Elizabeth Banks on Letterman; Howie Mandel on Leno; Dr. Phil on Kimmel; Christiane Amanpour and Anna Kendrick on Ferguson; Will Ferrell and Ellie Kemper on Fallon; Tom Selleck and Zosia Mamet on Conan; Robert Caro on Stewart; and Francis Collins on Colbert

Allegedly, last night’s episode of “The Voice” included a scene where Cee-Lo, one of the show’s judges, traveled to the fictional town of Pawnee, Indiana to retrieve his spinny chair thingy from “Parks and Recreation’s” Ron Swanson. I say “allegedly” because the only way I would watch “The Voice” is if every contestant on the show were a former member of the East Coast Family (never skipped a beat) and all the judges were babies in tiny little tuxedos, so I’m kinda taking people at their word on this one. Anyway, NBC released an extended version of the clip on their website, and it’s pretty cool for a few reasons, including Ron’s description of Cee-Lo (“about yay tall, bald, wearing sunglasses inside”), Andy’s very brief audition, and Rob Lowe’s Chris Traeger trying to wrangle Ron for Leslie. But, most importantly, it brings up one undeniable point: Ron Swanson should be a judge on “The Voice.”

Off the top of my head, I can’t think of many things funnier than cranky, man’s man Ron Swanson critiquing contestants on a reality singing show. I imagine he’d say things like “Son, that was not a note you should be able to hit. Eat more red meat,” or “That song you sang about your heart going on and on … did you write it?” and it would just be the best. He could sit between the two tuxedo-wearing babies. I am great at fixing TV.

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Upfronts start next week, which means that there will be a flurry of renewal and cancellation news, as well as news on all the new shows that will be picked up by the networks. There will probably be a period during the next week and a half in which the news will be coming at us so quickly, we won’t be able to keep up. That moment is not now. This is the quiet before the storm. In that quiet, we get blah news like this: NBC has renewed “Law and Order: SVU” for a fourteenth season. Does it matter that ratings really aren’t that great (6 million viewers, a 1.9 in the demo)? Not really. It’s NBC. There will always be a Dick Wolf show as long as Dick Wolf is around, otherwise NBC won’t be able to keep Dick Wolf happy enough to crap out a new yearly procedural like “Chicago Fire,” another show that NBC just picked up.

What is “Chicago Fire”? It’s exactly as it sounds: A show about firefighters in Chicago. It stars Taylor Kinney, Monica Raymund, David Eigenberg, Charlie Barnett, Lauren German, Teri Reeves and Merle Dandridge. I’ve heard of exactly one of those guys: Eigenberg, who played Steve on “Sex and the City.” This show will last 6 episodes, tops.

It’s also worth noting that the fake Speculative Schedule for NBC’s Fall Season has also leaked. It probably means nothing, BUT, if it is accurate (and so far, no new reports has conflicted with it), “Parks and Rec” and “30 Rock” may move to Wednesdays. But then, the schedule also has “Hannibal” on Friday, which seems like a waste for a high-profile show with Bryan Fuller, but then again, NBC is trying to own that night by building on the success of “Grimm.” The spec schedule also has “Harry’s Law” on it, but not “Parenthood,” and that makes me very, very upset. But again, it’s a spec. It supposedly means nothing. We’ll keep you posted.

Although NBC won’t hold its Upfront, where the network will announce its 2012-2013 TV schedule, until next Monday, they’ve already made news by picking up more than a half-dozen series so far: Ryan Murphy’s “The New Normal,” Eric Kripke’s “Revolution”…actually, I’ll get to all that later. Here’s what you care about: the fate of NBC’s existing Thursday night sitcoms. According to Deadline:

It looks like NBC’s “30 Rock” will be back for a likely-abbreviated seventh and final season. I hear the Emmy-winning comedy has closed deals with its key high-level writers to return for what is expected to be a final season of 13-14 episodes.

It’s tough imagining NBC without “30 Rock,” but a 14-episode final season isn’t a terrible thing; the series usually has a few dud episodes every year, and fewer episodes means stronger overall scripts. As for the rest:

As for NBC’s other bubble comedies, newbie “Whitney” does not appear likely to return. Fellow freshman “Up All Night” has been looking a little better, but its executive producer Jon Pollack just moved to NBC’s newly picked up comedy series “Go On” as a co-executive producer…As for veterans “Community” and “Parks & Recreation,” the former’s chances are considered 50-50, “Parks & Rec”‘s higher that that.

No matter what happens with “Community,” and we should know very soon, the news of its renewal or lack there of will likely cause the Internet to break. Have your “STREETS AHEAD” or “YOU ARE WORSE THAN BRITTA, NBC” comments ready. Here are the new shows that NBC has already picked up, with series synopses.

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Let’s take a minute to appreciate how good last night’s NBC lineup, minus “The Office,” was.

/watches Jon Hamm say “banjo!” 17 more times

“Community,” “30 Rock,” and “Parks and Recreation” were all great. If I had to name a single highlight, I’d give you five answers. And I will: Jon Hamm’s aforementioned pseudo-blackface routine; Alec Baldwin’s Jackie Gleason telling Tina Fey’s Audrey Meadows that she’s a “real cut-up…in fact, one of these days I’m gonna cut you up in pieces and feed you to the neighbor’s dogs”; Omar’s glance at Jeff after he mentions a man needing to have a code; Bobby Newport’s reaction to Leslie’s speech; and Andy’s Rambo and Road House recreations.

Plus, the banner image. This is a jam-packed, super-stuffed GIFs of the Week, so let’s do this.

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