While campaigning in Iowa yesterday, presidential candidate Mitt Romney ruffled America’s giant, yellow feathers. If he were head-of-state, Romney said, he’d stop government subsidizing for PBS, forcing shows like “Sesame Street” to collect funds from advertisers. Then, the M is for money quote:

“I like PBS, we subsidize PBS. Look — I’m gonna stop that, I’m gonna say PBS is gonna have to have advertisement. We’re not gonna kill Big Bird, but Big Bird’s gonna have advertisements, all right.”

Maybe it’s because I’m a corporate hack, sitting here in my Old Navy hoodie, but all things considered, I don’t think this is that big of a deal. The idea of cutting funding for such an insignificant portion of America’s budget is incredibly misguided and totally beside the point (.00014% of America’s $3.456 trillion budget went to the Corporation for Public Broadcasting in 2010, according to Politico), but I’m not against advertising as a rule. Just because “Sesame Street…seems lost in time,” which is evidently a valid reason not to change something according to EW, doesn’t mean the show’s charm would be lost if a Coke ad aired during the commercial break. It would then be up to PBS to not become the profit-driven monster they’re trying so hard not to be. Or else.

That being said, Romney picked the dumbest possible way of getting his message across. I can’t wait for his next speech: “Now, I’m not saying Bambi’s mom deserved to be shot, but…”

Nature: Radioactive Wolves (PBS) — The documentary series’ 30th season begins with a look at the thriving wildlife — particularly wolves — in the abandoned area surrounding Chernobyl. Somehow, I suspect it will not be as cool as the banner image.

Luther (BBC America) — Season finale. I’m pretty mad that I didn’t make it a point to watch this season, but in my defense I can catch up any time. A season of British TV is like three hours long.

Not the World Series (Fox) — It’s raining in St. Louis, so you can expect to see a lot of Joe Buck’s huge stupid forehead before the game gets postponed.

Modern Family/Happy Endings (ABC) — Phil takes Haley to look at colleges; guest star Gilles Marini hits on Claire. Meanwhile, I think I like “Happy Endings” better even on the weeks when “Modern Family” makes me laugh more. I blame that on the Emmys.

Up All Night (NBC) — It’s a flashback episode to when the baby was born. Because we’ve grown so attached to it over the first four weeks.

Revenge (ABC) — This seems to have gained a faithful following since debuting last month, but I haven’t seen it because I don’t have a vagina.

Suburgatory (ABC) — I found the pilot enjoyable, but I was put off by how bright and pink most of it was. I mean, it’s supposed to be Westchester, not Orange County.

Jerry Lewis, the 85-year-old comedian who’s famous for things your parents might have seen, will not host the Muscular Dystrophy Association telethon this year, and the MDA issued a press release announcing that he was no longer the organization’s chairman.

Just last week Lewis told reporters as he promoted “Method to the Madness of Jerry Lewis,” an Encore documentary about the legendary star, not to believe everything that had been reported, when asked if he was definitely out of hosting the MDA Telethon. [Access Hollywood]

On one hand, I want to handle this gently, because the MDA is a good cause and Lewis worked hard for it for so many years, and now he’s minutes away from dying (probably).

On the other hand, who gives a sh*t. Telethons started losing their relevance when the remote control got invented. The fact that the MDA is still relying on one when people have the internet and a couple hundred cable channels should tell you how well the organization is navigating the 21st century. Oh, they got rid of the 85-year-old host? Great job. Maybe in another 20 years they can tell me what the year 2011 is like.

Leigh and Leslie Keno, the twins who host PBS’s “Antiques Roadshow,” will make the leap to television that people actually watch with a new show on Fox called “Buried Treasure.” I’m sure it will be nothing like “Antiques Roadshow”…

The brothers will travel the country hunting for hidden gems in peoples’ homes. Using their expertise and technology to determine authenticity and condition, the duo will reveal each item’s estimated auction value and gives the family a chance to sell. [EW]

…ir it will be exactly like “Antiques Roadshow,” but with some flashy graphics that PBS can’t afford.

“Right now, a lot of people in America need cash, and we’re helping them find it in their own homes,” says Joe Livecchi, series creator and executive producer… “We don’t really look at this as an antiques show because every episode is a treasure hunt.”

To help foster the idea that this is a treasure show and not an antiques show, I’ve provided some conceptual art in the banner image. Because the only way I’d ever watch this is if the Kenos dressed and talked like pirates the entire hour. Eye patches or GTFO.

Freedom Riders (PBS) — It’s been 50 years since the nonviolent Freedom Riders took their interracial bus trip through the segregated South, and this documentary covers the nonviolent protesters who deliberately violated Jim Crow laws at the risk of their personal safety. Preview embedded below. (Pictured: James Zwerg after being beaten by a racist mob. You can learn more about him here.)

Castle (ABC) — Season 3 finale. A character that has been around since the beginning of the show will die tonight. How much you wanna bet it’s a black or Hispanic guy?

Chuck (NBC) — Season finale. It’s the long-awaited wedding of Chuck and Sarah. Honestly, I never understood the passion for this show. The little bit of charm that it has is more than negated by some of the hokiest action scenes on TV.

Real Housewives of New Jersey (Bravo) — Season premiere. Coke whore felon Danielle Staub is no longer part of the cast; she’s been replaced with two other women that I’m sure I’d hate if I ever wasted an hour of my life sitting through an episode.

OTHER SEASON FINALES: “Gossip Girl” (CW), “Hawaii Five-0″ (CBS), “How I Met Your Mother” (CBS), “Mad Love” (CBS), “90210″ (CW), and “Wedding Wars” (VH1).

LATE NIGHT GUESTS: Julianna Margulies and uber-douche Andy Cohen on Letterman; Eva Mendes on Leno; Zach Galifianakis on Conan; Eva Longoria and Ellie Kemper on Lopez; and Howie Mandel and Cee-Lo Green on Fallon. Why did we start using Cee-Lo’s last name? Are there other Cee-Los I should know about?

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