Veterans Day was Friday, and while I took the day off in solemn remembrance, Danger Guerrero posted this heartwarming video of a dog greeting her owner upon his return from deployment to Afghanistan. The video above is like that, but longer and with more dogs greeting their military owners and set to Queen’s “You’re My Best Friend.” Why yes, I am writing while sniffling and fighting back tears.

In case this isn’t TV-newsy enough for you, here’s a related story: Spike TV is heading up an initiative encouraging businesses to hire veterans.

“Hire A Veteran” will showcase companies — “from Main St. to Wall St.” — who provide jobs for veterans returning home from service, and includes a website with information for job-seeking veterans, with lists of companies looking to hire vets, help with job training and for vets looking to start their own businesses.

Spike TV will air a series of “Honor Roll” spots featuring real veterans talking about companies who have hired them, while stars like Samuel L. Jackson, Scarlett Johansson, George Lucas and Bradley Cooper are filming a series of “Hire A Veteran” promotional clips for the network. [Reuters]

I’ve tried to write like eight different conclusions celebrating this as a worthy cause, but my brain just keeps coming back to “Scarlett Johansson” and “job.” Because if there’s something more important than helping our veterans find work, it’s me having a sexual encounter with Scarlett Johansson.

[Video from WelcomeHomeBlog via BuzzFeed]

I’m tired of PSAs always looking out for people’s safety and well-being at the cost of doing fun things like drugs and smoking and driving drunk. That’s what’s so refreshing about this PSA. Well, that and the Hitler joke. Hitler jokes are one of our greatest national resources.

[via BuzzFeed]

About four or five years ago, statisticians first noticed that veterans of Iraq and Afghanistan were committing suicide at startling rates, and the trend has only gone up since then. Every day, eighteen veterans attempt suicide, and veterans account for 20% of suicide deaths in America even though they represent only 8% of the population. So it’s nice to see celebrities get together to make these suicide prevention PSAs that will air on the Military Channel. It’s a well-written appeal: the line about “Your family needs you” is spot-on, especially if you’ve read the heartbreaking story of Jacob Andrews.

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It’s April 20th, which means that plenty of idiots are out there saying, “Huh huh huh… 4/20, dude.” I’ve got nothing against marijuana use, and I’m all for its legalization, but I’m a little too old to get excited about an arrangement of numbers on the calendar. It’s like Pi Day: no one but mathletes should make a big deal out of it.

However, since this is the Internet, I don’t stem the tides, I swim with them. So here’s a PSA from the ’90s in which the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles help young children say no to fourth-grade drug dealers. This is how ALL young people are introduced to marijuana, of course: confronted at their locker by older kids who dare them to try a joint in the hallway between classes. It’s almost TOO subtle.

[via BuzzFeed's collection of anti-drug PSAs. YOU ALL RIGHT! I LEARNED IT BY WATCHING YOU!]

Here’s a PSA from the 1970s warning young people about the danger of venereal disease — excuse me, sexually transmitted infections — through the power of song. What I like best about this video, aside from the Motown reject singing about VD, is that it works nicely with the VD Is for Everybody PSA — also from the ’70s, and also using music to deliver a message. If you remember that video, it’s possible you remember my “slutty baby” joke, which spurred this comment from someone with a great sense of humor:

They should bring those commercials back. The “slutty baby” comment, although meant to be clever, illustrates the widespread ignorance about venereal diseases. FYI, women with active veneral diseases such as gonnorhea, syphilis, chlamydia, and ever-popular HPV, who give birth can very easily pass those diseases on to their baby or cause blindness in the baby. Instead of making lame jokes, you ought to educate yourself.

Actually, a mother with HPV can’t cause blindness in a baby. Unless she pokes its eyes out or pours acid in them.

[video via BuzzFeed]