Pictured on the right here is “Mad Men’s” Christina Hendricks as she looked in real life at Sunday’s Golden Globe Awards. On the left: the distorted image that the New York Times ran to accompany an article that basically called her fat. In fact, the Grey Lady had TWO articles scrutinizing female stars’ appearance — both written by women. From Gothamist:

The first piece, written by Andy Port (yes, a woman), declares that Jennifer Aniston, Courtney Cox and workout queen Kate Hudson have all “put on a little weight.” Though she says they are “sporting sexier curves” she then goes on to say it’s concentrated in their upper arms.

Then, Cathy Horyn decides to take down the gorgeous Christina Hendricks — the Mad Men actress known for her sexy curves… which are decidedly not concentrated in her upper arms. In her piece she writes, “Not pretty Christina Hendricks in Christian Siriano’s exploding ruffle dress. (As one stylist said, ‘You don’t put a big girl in a big dress.’)”

The Times has since corrected the mistake, calling it a result of “routine processing.” Really? Because I do “routine processing” on Photoshop all day long, and when I resize or crop photos, that never seems to happen. I could understand if a dog in a funny hat showed up in the picture, but that’s just inexcusable. It’s unfair to the millions of women who are actually fat and need to lose weight.

More Golden Globes coverage. Yes yes, I get your double entendres about “golden globes” and “red carpet.” Let’s be honest: the cleavage is amazing, but Christina Hendricks’s dress is horribly ugly. Which is why I’d happily remove it from her. There are more pictures of Hendricks at the bottom of the post (and of Warming Glow favorites Olivia Wilde and Lisa Edelstein), but first you have to  look through all the other TV stuff that’s been going on. It’s all going in the link dump because I want to get at least half the day off. [FilmDrunk]

Saturday Night Live discussion here. Sigourney Weaver hosted. There was a Conan-Leno sketch. The Ting Tings performed. Did you like it? I don’t care. [Hulu]

NBC: the biggest a-holes that ever gaped. When Conan leaves, NBC is going to keep the intellectual property like In the Year 3000, the Pimpbot 5000, and the Masturbating Bear. It remains unclear NBC owns Triumph the Insult Comic Dog. [The Hollywood Reporter]

I loved her in ‘Viper.’ How not to win the ladies over: display freakish knowledge of “Baywatch” supporting characters. [Steel Clink Alcatraz]

Read the rest of this entry »

The few of us who survived the Golden Globes drinking game and Billy Bush saying retarded things were treated to an awards show that was faster and less full of itself than the Oscars. And also less memorable in every way. Ricky Gervais was a funny but woefully underused host, and, uhhh… I don’t really have a good way to finish that compound sentence. Things are kinda fuzzy for me, what with the drinking game and all. I vaguely remember being aroused by Sofia Vergara’s accent.

Anyway, I’ve got the full list of TV winners below.  Basically, “Mad Men” won for best drama, “Glee” won best comedy/musical, and Michael C. Hall won for having cancer. But that’s fine, he deserved a win — if not for “Dexter,” then certainly for “Six Feet Under.” I don’t have any huge quibbles with anything except the winners in the actress categories: Chloe Sevigny in “Big Love” for Supporting Actress, Julianna Margulies in “The Good Wife” for Lead Actress in a Drama, and Toni Collette in “United States of Tara” for Lead Actress in a Comedy. I like both Margulies and Collette, but I think there were far better candidates (see my picks here). As for Sevigny, the only thing she deserves is a push into speeding traffic. I’d rather get Michael C. Hall’s cancer than wake up next to her.

Read the rest of this entry »

Back in the dark days before I got a job sitting at home and Photoshopping dogs into pictures, I had one of those soul-crushing real jobs that involved a lot of Microsoft Excel and sending out form emails. My entire life was ctrl+c, ctrl+v, and coffee breaks. The company I worked for designed interactive websites for various beauty products, clothing lines, TV shows, and God knows what else.

That’s a roundabout way of introducing this website where you can vote for which dress “Mad Men” star Christina Hendricks will wear at the SAG Awards. It’s sponsored by Degree, which means it’s exactly the kind of slick cross-promotional marketing site I used to help create, and therefore I’d prefer to ignore it.

However, there’s a powerful counterpoint: titties. Unfortunately for us, the voting choices are limited to three red gowns that really aren’t all that different, which is a shame. I was hoping for a “covered in pieces of buttered toast” option. C’mon Degree, at least make room for write-in ballots.

Hey buddy, you mind? I’m tryin’ to watch something that matters.

The Emmys were last night, and unless you’ve got an iron will and the patience of Job, it’s unlikely you watched the entire telecast.

So here’s the entire night: “30 Rock” and “Mad Men” won for best comedy and drama, respectively; the pleasant surprises were Kristen Chenoweth for supporting actress in “Pushing Daisies” and Michael Emerson for supporting actor in “Lost”; and the most unpleasant surprises were Jon Cryer winning  best supporting actor in a comedy for “Two and a Half Men” and the criminal snub of “Generation Kill” for best miniseries, which went to “Little Dorritt.” There you go. That’s everything that’s worth talking about if you want to pretend that the Emmys have half the import of the Oscars.

More importantly, following a night where all of my TV crushes were assembled in one place, I’d like to petition the government to make Blake Lively’s breasts a national monument of some sort. I know I’ve said this before, but they are SPECTACULAR. And I don’t mean that in any kind of chauvinist or demeaning way: they’re just a natural beauty crafted by God, like Devil’s Tower or the Badlands or the falls at Yosemite. You should be able to pay $15 to elbow some German tourists out of the way and get a good look at them. I wanna go camping there.

(live blog here, more on the winners here, excellent column on the awards here)