Once again, it’s time to play our favorite game: FLORIDA OR OHIO? Today’s subject is Josh, a young man on TLC’s “Strange Addictions” who claims to have consumed 250 light bulbs and 100 champagne flutes over the last four years. Although the video below makes this seem more like a party trick than a true compulsion like eating couch stuffing, it still doesn’t take away from the fact that HE’S EATING GLASS.
So take your guess: is this wackjob from Florida or Ohio? The answer is after the video.
This security camera footage of a woman falling into a mall fountain because she’s too busy texting went viral on BuzzFeed earlier this week, and it’s about as satisfying as a bad-thing-happens-to-texting-moron video can be without 
bodily harm happening. Personally, I’d prefer to see “texter gets hit by bus” or “texter falls off ledge into industrial sausage grinder,” because I get off on Darwinian cruelty. I’m all about thinning the herd, if you know what I’m saying.
And if you think that sentiment is too cruel, check out the CNN clip below that features an interview with the “victim,” 49-year-old Pennsylvania native Cathy Cruz Marrero, who is actually pursuing legal action against the mall. Urge. To Kill. RISING.
On Friday, Oprah did her last-ever “Favorite Things” show in which she plays Santa Claus and gives away tons of free crap. This video is a compilation of all of the audience reactions during that show, and it is downright terrifying. FIVE WHOLE MINUTES of people losing their sh*t and crying because they got a watch or earrings or whatever. No joke: I find this to be way more disturbing than graphic images of zombies eating people on “The Walking Dead.”
Strangely, as unsettling as the video is, it provides some delightful screencaps and animated GIFs. This justifies the entire existence of Faces of the Last Season of Oprah.
The debut of “Sarah Palin’s Alaska” on TLC drew about 5 million viewers, which is a record for a series premiere on that channel. And while those are excellent ratings for a cable show, let’s not announce the apocalypse/declare candidacy for 2012 (depending on your politics) just yet. The premiere of AMC’s “The Walking Dead” had slightly more viewers, and the third season of “Jersey Shore” was regularly pulling in over six million per episode. So yes: a lot of people watched it, but not enough to make a sweeping generalization about the state of America.
Anyway, I want to wash my hands of this subject as quickly as possible, but I’ll point you in the direction of Gawker TV’s five most ridiculous moments from the show, as well as Tim Goodman’s fairly even-handed review for The Hollywood Reporter. Here’s the crux of it:
What’s most unfortunate about Alaska is that what could have been a very good travel and nature series gets co-opted by politics and the faux believability of a reality show.
Alaska deserves better. I mean, the natural beauty of Alaska deserves a better TV show. Alaska the state deserves a hero like Palin. Why, just look at her cuddling those puppies in the snow! She’s a saint!
Comedienne Kristen Schaal — who’s probably best known as Mel from “Flight of the Conchords” and as a contributor to “The Daily Show” — has been tweeting some egregious examples of product placements in “Days of Our Lives.” 
Except to call them “product placements” insinuates that they’re in some way subtle; rather, these are full-blown ads inserted into the story, as if viewers haven’t gotten any savvier since the 1950s (note: most soap opera viewers HAVEN’T gotten any savvier since the 1950s).
Above is a blatant ad spot for Midol; below, two more egregious examples of shilling for Chex Mix and Wanchai Ferry Chinese Food. It’s so bad that one of the characters is like, “Chex Mix? What’s that? WHY DON’T YOU TELL ME ABOUT IT?” That dialog is less believable than the handsome one-eyed doctor waking up from a ten-year coma.
![[avatar]](http://p.uproxxcdn.com/global/images/default-avatar.jpg){kind=avatar}
