In the television world, career longevity is a rarity. Typically, if you’re lucky enough to land one successful television show, your odds of landing another aren’t good. Ask Jason Alexander. Ask Roseanne. Or Jenna Elfman. Or Paul Reiser. Or Bronson Pinchot. What’s even more rare is not only landing two successful shows, but landing them a decade apart. Rarer still is being as crush-worthy an actor in his or her 30s and 40s as he or she was in their teens and 20s.

But it happens. Not terribly often, but it does. Here are 10 instances representing the spectrum of TV crushes that you might have had in the 90s and that, thanks to an ability to maintain a high profile — and good looks — over a decade or more, you may still nurse today.

Christina Applegate — “Married with Children” (1987 – 1997) and “Up All Night” (2011 – )

Mark-Paul Gosselaar — “Saved by the Bell” (1989 – 1993) and “Franklin & Bash” (2010 – )

Jennifer Love Hewitt — “Party of Five” (1994 – 2000) and “Ghost Whisperer” (2005 -2010)

Josh Charles — “Sports Night” (1998 – 2000) and “The Good Wife” (2009 – )

Claire Danes — “My So Called Life” (1994-95) and “Homeland” (2011 -)

Alyssa Milano — “Who’s the Boss?” (1984 – 1992) and “Charmed” (1998 – 2006)

Neil Patrick Harris — “Doogie Howser, M.D.” (1989 – 1993) and “How I Met Your Mother” (2005 – )

Tiffani Thiessen — “Saved by the Bell” (1989 – 1993) and “White Collar” (2009 – )

Connie Britton — “Spin City” (1996 – 2002) and “Friday Night Lights” (2006 – 2011) “American Horror Story” (2011 – )

Carla Gugino — “Spin City” (1996 – 2002) and “Justified” (2012)

How many times have you gone to Wikipedia today, only to get their “Imagine a World without Free Knowledge” message? It’s happened to me four times already (I STILL don’t know the complete biographical background on the dad from “Webster”), and I’m pretty sure it’ll occur nine more times before the day’s out. But I’m not mad; I can wait to know what movies were shot in South Dakota. It’s for a good cause.

Today is SOPA Day on the Internet. Hundreds of websites, including Wikipedia and Reddit, are protesting the very bad Stop Online Piracy and Protect IP acts because, well, they’re very bad. Matt wrote about it back in November, and Señor Fancy Lawyer Man Danger Guerrero would like to add:

I can’t stress strongly enough to all of you how terrible the whole SOPA/PIPA thing is…Not only will this bill throw a giant wrench into the Internet, it also has SERIOUS Constitutional ramifications. It gives mass copyright holders (Disney, record companies, Viacom, etc.) the ability to restrict people’s speech and take away their property (websites) without due process.

That’s my favorite kind of process! So, contact your local representative and tell them, SOPA STINKS. After you’ve done that – ONLY after you’ve done that – check back here to see how the Internet has been reacting to the threat of censorship, through the use of TV shows and characters. I’ve added a few of my own, as should you. Find an image, add text here, and copy the link in the comments. We’ll include the best in the slideshow.

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Me too, Professor. Me too.

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Even the ponies, and presumably bronies, know.

(Via)

Neither does Randy Marsh.

THIS is the best one.

I made the following images, and you should too!

One of my favorite parts about the tiny slice of the Internet I occupy is that whenever something “Saved by the Bell”-related happens, people rush to inform me. So when this video popped up yesterday, I got absolutely bombarded. A dozen emails, a ton of tweets and DMs, messages on my Tumblr, all of it. I wouldn’t have it any other way. You can’t imagine how happy it makes me that y’all see a “Saved by the Bell” clip on the Internet and immediately think of me. If nothing else, it validates the hours I spent watching that nonsensefest growing up, and the thousands and thousands of words I’ve devoted to the show on the Internet over the past few years. (NOTE: It most certainly does not.)

The video itself is pretty straightforward. It takes dramatic or awkward moments from the show, and lays the “WOO!” audience sound effect that played when characters would kiss over top of them. The result is hilariously inappropriate. It’s a simple premise executed well, and I really enjHOLY CRAP WHY DIDN’T I THINK OF THIS VIDEO FIRST. IT WAS RIGHT IN FRONT OF MY FACE THE WHOLE TIME. I blame all of you. Sure, you can tell me when the clip’s already been made, but you can’t email me the idea beforehand so I can scoop up all the traffic? I’m a busy guy! I’ve got, uh, GIFs to look at. Lots of them! I can’t do this by myself, people. I expect more out of you. You can do better.

I’m glad we had this talk.

Haskins and former With Leather editor Josh Zerkle

Dennis Haskins, the actor who played Mr. Belding on “Saved by the Bell,” now earns a comfortable living making appearances at bars around the country, where the kids who watched the ’90s TV staple are now disillusioned adults who crave whatever slice of pop culture nostalgia the world can offer them. From Fox 411:

Today, Haskins has managed to parlay his Mr. Belding brand into a lucrative business making appearances at bars around the country.

“The markets I play the best in are the ones with people 20-35. Mr. Belding is universal,” Haskins told Fox411 in an interview about his bar and club business. “Personal appearances are a way many actors from older shows supplement their income, and it is a blessing.”

Some people may think it’s sad that a 60-year-old man has to live in a role he last played 11 years ago in order to make a living, but I think it’s cool that he’s having fun with it. I mean, it’s a little sad, but not as sad as Jaleel White trying to break into other roles and asking people not  to call him Urkel.

And there’s more:

Haskins regularly hosts evenings at Chateau and Gallery in Las Vegas and the kinds of bars that are popular with a fratty crowd in New York City like the bull riding saloon Johnny Utah’s, McFaddens and Turtle Bay.

(FYI, Turtle Bay is AWFUL.)

He has also judged a “Naughty School Girl” contest at the club Body English in Las Vegas.

Turtle Bay NYC owner Elizabeth Wittels was responsible for recruiting Haskins to come to her bar and the other New York City watering holes. She says the “Back to School with Mr. Belding” nights hosted by her establishments have become a roaring success.

“He really does attract a crowd,” Wittels tells Fox411. “It is a good fit for our fun party-type bars. He has this weird appeal with a very specific generation of 22-35 year olds who grew up with him. He looks exactly the same, and I feel like he takes the adults back to their youth.”

Haskins declined to comment on what he makes for his bar appearances, but Wittels says most celebs that do these kinds of appearances “make between $2,500 to $25,000 a pop. Once you’re over $25,000 you’re in the super A-list range and most bars can’t afford them, with the exception of the Kardashians which some ultra lounges will pay stupid money for.”

Let me just go ahead and correct Ms. Wittels here. If you’re getting paid to make appearances at bars and clubs, you are NOT an A-list celebrity.

And unlike many a celebrity on the D-list through the A-list, Haskins says he has never taken his fame for granted. “I don’t look away when people look at me. I say hi. I stop and take pictures,” Haskins said.

A typical appearance involves Haskins hanging out at the bar for approximately two hours, usually starting after 10 pm when things are already jumping. He walks in and the crowd goes a little bananas, screaming and cheering. Things reach a fever pitch when they play the “Saved by the Bell” theme song. Haskins takes the stage and gives his signature Belding laugh along with a “Hey, hey, hey” which he became famous for when he would call Mark Paul Gosselaar’s Zach into his office.

“I’m not gonna go sit in a corner and say come say ‘hi.’ I get right in the middle and we take pictures for two hours and sign autographs. It is warm and fuzzy,” Haskins says.

This makes me kinda happy for him. He’s just content with his little sliver of fame, and he’s making the most of it with a positive and friendly attitude. Good for him.

And sometimes he runs into old friends. Alfonso Ribeiro, who played Carlton on the sitcom the “Fresh Prince of Bel Air” is on the same appearance circuit and the two often cross paths and share dressing rooms. “We used to shoot a few sets away from each other so it is a nice reunion,” Haskins says.

And Haskins’ Belding is a much bigger success than some appearances by other “Saved By the Bell” stars. “What is funny is we used to have Screech, Dustin Diamond, come to the bars a lot,” Wittels said. “And I will tell you Belding has a much bigger draw than Screech.”

Well duh, everybody hates Screech.

Oh, this is a real treat. Pleated Jeans has put together a supercut of Very Special Episodes from the ’80s and ’90s. I have no idea why Very Special Episodes ever came to prominence, but they’re certainly hilarious in retrospect. Obviously, the most famous scene is Jessie’s meltdown after she gets hooked on caffeine pills in “Saved by the Bell,” but there are some other gems here, including:

• Future two-time Oscar winner Tom Hanks as the drunk uncle on “Family Ties.”
• Donna getting thrown down the stairs by her abusive boyfriend on “90210″ (2:30 mark, FYI).
• The episode of “Punky Brewster” where Cherie hides in the refrigerator and almost dies from asphyxiation. Man, I’d forgotten all about that episode! I definitely made sure to never hide in refrigerators after that episode.

Anyway, be sure to watch the whole thing, and be sad all over again when Steve Urkel doesn’t fall to his death.

In 1992, “Saved by the Bell” aired a four-episode TV movie in which the gang flew to Hawaii and saved Kelly’s grandfather’s hotel by terrorizing tourists. It was precisely as stupid as everything else that happened on “Saved by the Bell,” except Lisa and Kelly and Jesse wore bikini tops.

It should come as no surprise, then, that Warming Glow contributor Danger Guerrero is joining forces with lolslater — Tumblr’s finest “SBTB”-only blog — to spend an entire week talking about the movie. They’re spending one day discussing each episode in turn, then Friday they’ll answer reader questions about this fine piece of TV history (you can ask submit queries here or here). Here’s an excerpt from today’s entry:

LS: Between the gang’s junior and senior year of high school, they all go to visit Kelly’s grandfather, who owns a hotel in Honolulu, I guess.  Then a whole bunch of Saved By the Bellish things happen and we all learn a valuable lesson about something and I feel bad about myself for watching it. THE END.

DG: So I guess the most important part of Part 1 is the Screech thing, right? I mean, we could start with the part where Kelly’s family could apparently afford a round trip ticket to Hawaii, but not a ticket to the prom… but I think the fact that a white dork from California turned out to be the long-awaited savior of a native Hawaiian tribe is somewhat more important. And by “somewhat more important,” I mean “way a lot racist.” FUN FACT: Like 30% of the “indigenous Hawaiian tribesman” are just white dudes in straw hats!

Reading the entire thing is probably the best possible use of your time, assuming you have a terrible job and enjoy remembering awful pop culture. I love the Internet.

Despite strong ratings of late, producers of the CBS daytime gabfest “The Talk” have decided to shake things up and make some changes. Deadline reports that only co-hosts Sara Gilbert, Sharon Osbourne and Julie Chen will be returning for the third season, meaning that Leah Remini, aka “Saved by the Bell’s” Stacy Carosi, will not be brought back.

Now, I don’t know much about “The Talk.” As far as I can tell, it’s basically like “The View,” but with younger ladies. And when I say “as far as I can tell,” what I mean is “based on just sitting here and guessing because I really don’t feel like Googling this show to find out.” But what I DO know is that when there is TV news that involves someone who once had a fairly prominent role on “Saved by the Bell,” that means I have an opportunity to post some SBTB GIFs, mostly of Kelly Kapowski, without Matt yelling at me for trying to shoehorn in irrelevant stuff about the show. And you would be an insane person to assume I’m not going to do that. So yeah, click on through for that.

Oh, and also not being retained by “The Talk” is former “Hangin’ With Mr. Cooper” star Holly Robinson Peete, who to my knowledge never had a part on “Saved by the Bell” and therefore was justifiably not included in the banner pic or headline of this post.

Welcome to the morning links. Click on them or I’ll starve to death. Banner image via sentivivo.

Sasha Grey will take your questions now. “Can I, uh… take you to dinner? That can either be a metaphor or not.” [Uproxx] (Reminder: If you have any interest in what’s happening on the Internet, you really need to be following what the Cajun Boy’s doing on the Uproxx main page.)

‘You are under so much arrest.’ If you’re not a long-time reader of The Dugout, meet two of the comic’s greatest characters: Elijah Dukes and LadyCop. [With Leather]

Superheroes and Supervillains Throughout History. As if Stalin wasn’t enough, now the Russians have Darth Vader. [Gamma Squad]

Top Ten Movies People Lie About Having Seen. I’ve never actually seen Taxi Driver (#3 on the list). I don’t particularly feel the need to lie about that. [FilmDrunk]

After the jump, more links and a “Saved by the Bell” GIF that will set Danger Guerrero’s heart aflame.

This is why women are crazy. A breakdown of the differences between dress sizes across the fashion industry. [I Love Charts]

Every character on ‘The Office’ ranked from least funny to funniest. Whoa, Creed is only #8? That’s highway robbery. [Nerve]

This is me when I found out “The Paul Reiser Show” got canceled (via bunnyfood):

And, as promised, twirling Kelly Kapowski (via F Yeah 1990s):

Watch out, Angela Landsbury! The future is now! [F Yeah Murder She Wrote]

In case you missed it: One Shining Moment. Yeah, the NCAA championship game was crap, but the tournament was awesome. And I’m still waiting to see a “One Shining Moment” video set to an array of the bricks that Butler threw up on Monday. [With Leather]

Awww, dammit. I was saving this winking wiener corgi for Friday, but RoboPanda got to him first. That dude knows his corgis. [Gamma Squad]

This Week in F*ck You: People who insist on using typewriters. Nobody rages like Big Daddy Drew. [KSK]

Why did Julie Taymore get fired from the Spider-Man musical? Duh, sexism. Clearly a man would never lose his job for failure to keep a project on budget or on time. [FilmDrunk]

Surprise, surprise. Wendy Williams — not Kirstie Alley — got voted off “Dancing with the Stars.” [TV Squad]

Stick around after the jump; that’s where all the good stuff is.

RUN, DO NOT WALK to check out the Name of the Year ballot. This is the best one ever: Rockwell Bonecutter is a nine-seed. [NOTY]

A damn fine cup of coffee. In light of the positive reception to “The Killing,” here’s an awesome collection of stills from “Twin Peaks.” I gotta re-watch that show. [Twin Peaks Archive]

Odd Future Dog:

[We Hate College]

For Danger Guerrero:

[cheezwizkhalifa]

Tom Selleck Mouth-Eyes:

[aviary]

Finally, as Danger Guerrero said to me, “I don’t know if this video of Kate Upton for Guess counts as a commercial. Also, I do not care if this video of Kate Upton for Guess counts as a commercial.”

HO. LEE. CRAP.

So the “Rockumentary” episode of “Saved by the Bell” was on TBS the other morning. As I was watching it, I came to the realization that I know just about all the words to all the songs by the fictional band Zack Attack. I’m ok with this. After the episode, I took the ol’ Google box to see if I could find a clip from the episode to post on my Twitter, because, well, that’s what I do. Instead, I came upon this — the “Saved by the Bell” soundtrack, for sale on Amazon. If scientists ever figure out a way to turn WANT into an alternative energy source, I could have fueled the space program for a decade. But then… oh no…

ONE HUNDRED AND TWENTY FIVE DOLLARS?! Holy mother of God. Look, I’m as big a nostalgic ’90s-/Kelly Kapowski-loving sap as there is in the world, but even I have enough self-respect to not blow $100+ on this. Maybe after a couple dozen drinks I could convince myself to get a used copy for $32, but come on, Amazon. You’re killing me here.

One additional note: Do yourself a favor and scroll down to the first review. Amazon user “aizjanika ‘veggie33′” has broken it down by track, with an explanation and personal take on each song, as well as a wish list of songs that weren’t included. Sample quote, “4. Love Me Now — This is a song from the “Rockumentary” episode. This is the song that Zack wrote with Mindy. The rest of the gang was not enthusiastic about this song–neither am I!” I love the Internet so much sometimes.

Below: “Friends Forever.” Don’t act like you don’t know the words.