Twenty years, forty pounds, and 500 hair plugs ago
A reality television production company is suing A&E and Steven Seagal, claiming that they first approached Seagal with the possibility of doing a reality show and that the new show “Steven Seagal: Lawman” (AKA The Greatest Show Ever Made) was their idea.
“Seagal did not agree to sign anything in writing,” reads the suit, “but said that his handshake is his bond and that ‘we have a deal.’”
Oh man, someone’s never seen Jerry Maguire.
According to the suit, the producers initially pitched ideas to cable networks titled “Steven Seagal’s Sidekick” and “Kung Pow,” both of which featured wannabe action stars competing to become the actor’s protege.
A&E was interested in working with the actor, but wanted an idea that was more based in reality rather than something so clearly contrived. Plaintiffs claimed they proposed following Seagal’s real-life work as a New Orleans deputy sheriff and that A&E loved the idea. [THR]
I don’t know about their claims. Steven Seagal is a good man, he wouldn’t do anything dishonest or in his own best self-interest. Like when it was Steven Seagal Day at Planet Hollywood, and the clamoring masses couldn’t get into the chain restaurant because it was snowed in. Steven Seagal donned his Native American-themed jacket, channeled the ancient spirits of the snow plow, and cleared that walkway in no time. And this is only tangentially related, but his spirit animal is a circus bear.
OH MY GOD. Must. Stay. Calm. Steven Seagal will star in a new A&E reality series that chronicles his actual service in the Jefferson Parish Sheriff’s Office in Louisiana. Really. Honest. I swear to God. This is not a joke. From the press release:
Until now, Seagal has never sought publicity for his work with the Jefferson Parish Sheriff’s Office. However, over a span of almost two decades, he has regularly gone out on patrol and worked major cases. The series will allow fans to ride shotgun with Seagal as he and his hand-selected elite team of deputies respond to crimes-in-progress. [nola.com]
There are no words for this joy. I want to go up to strangers on the street and give them hugs. Because this reflects the simple genius of someone saying, “I like ‘Cops,’ but I’d like it better if Steven Seagal were one of the cops.”
