This video from Atom.com starring Julie Klausner is an awesome spoof of “The Dog Whisperer.” It’s a pretty simple premise…

“I’m the Cat Whisperer. I whisper sh*t to cats. No cat is too much for me to handle. I tell cats all kinds of f*cking secrets. Think you can do it? F*ck you, you’re wrong.”

…but the execution is a great collection of non sequitur jokes. One of my favorites:

“When I was 26, I lost my virginity. To a snowman. I f*cked him ’til he melted.”

Anyway, I know it’s a joke, but I would seriously prefer watching this to “The Dog Whisperer” on Animal Planet. Hmmm… a Cuban guy with a lisp jerking dogs’ chains? Or a surly redhead abusing cat owners? I’ll take the latter every time.

[via BuzzFeed]

In what may be the single-worst idea for a ridiculously terrible scripted TV show in Hollywood’s long and spectacular history of terrible ideas, Fox is developing an alleged sitcom that will star Wilmer Valderrama as a character based on “Dog Whisperer” Cesar Millan. And I think I speak for everyone when I say, “WOOF.”

Details are still being ironed out, but it appears that Valderrama would play the character based on Millan, who has built a lucrative empire based on his skills as a professional dog trainer…

Project reunites ["Hung" writer Emily] Kapnek with Valderrama; she wrote Fox pilot “The Emancipation of Ernesto” last year for the star, but that series didn’t move forward. [Variety]

And why didn’t that series move forward? I’ll give you a hint: the answer begins with “Wilmer” and ends in “Valderrama.” And the answer is two words long. Give up? It’s Wilmer Valderrama, because he’s f-cking TERRIBLE. When you’re the most annoying member of a cast that includes Ashton Kutcher and Danny Masterson, you deserve to be torn apart by wild dogs. So let’s cross our fingers, people.