Last spring, Howie Kohlenberg, a 47-year-old beauty products salesman and entrepreneur, appeared on “The Marriage Ref” with his 37-year-old wife, Christine. Since then, Kohlenberg’s struggling business failed, his wife left him to chase Hollywood dreams, and he’s gone bankrupt and now faces eviction. And Kohlenberg’s blowing the whistle on the monster who created this mess: “Marriage Ref” producer Jerry Seinfeld. The NY Post has this groundbreaking scoop:

Kohlenberg says he and Christine were happily married but having money issues with their now-defunct Midtown spa when a friend suggested auditioning for the show. They were picked out of a pool of thousands. ”We did it to drum up some business,” he said. “They promised to promote the spa on air. They didn’t.”

Whoa whoa whoa. Is he saying that some people in the television industry… didn’t fulfill a promise? But that’s DISHONEST! This is the first time I’ve ever heard of such moral shortcomings in Hollywood.

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The Marriage Ref (NBC) — America’s Sweetheart Gwyneth Paltrow headlines the guest panel with Jerry Seinfeld and comic Greg Giraldo. Wait, did I say America’s Sweetheart? That’s a mistake. I meant “uppity judgmental bitch.” Sorry. I get those mixed up sometimes.

The Imploders (TLC) — Tonight, they implode a cake. Probably. I’m just guessing.

Dudesons in America (MTV) — Series premiere. Starring Jukka, Jarppi, HP, and Jarno, it’s like “Jackass” but with Finnish guys. So I guess it should be pronounced “Yakass,” which shouldn’t make me laugh as much as it just did.

Grey’s Anatomy/Private Practice (ABC) — Promos for these shows are the worst part about watching “Lost.” I actually feel insulted every time I see one.

Vampire Diaries/Supernatural (CW) — For young girls who will eventually become the women who now watch “Grey’s Anatomy” and ‘Private Practice.”

Community (NBC) — The highly-anticipated (by me) water paintball fight episode. And ladies, don’t tell me you wouldn’t buywhat Joel McHale’s selling. Later on NBC, “30 Rock” has a Mother’s Day episode. Speaking, of, since I didn’t make it to the post office to mail her gift today, I’d like to take this opportunity to say “I love you” to my mom. And I’d appreciate it if the commenters refrained from doing the same.

NBC has renewed three series for old people and braindead retards: the allegedly comedic relationship game show “The Marriage Ref,” the Guy Fieri-hosted “Minute to Win It,” and celebrity genealogy show “Who Do You Think You Are.”

Now, “The Marriage Ref” is bad, but it can be okay if NBC lines up some entertaining guest judges (like when Larry David and Ricky Gervais were on the show). “Who Do You Think You Are” is easy enough to ignore. But the Internet as a whole hasn’t done an adequate job of lambasting “Minute to Win It” and the continued existence of Guy Fieri. Dude, if Bobby freakin’ Moynihan can do a decent impression of you, you KNOW you suck.

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The Marriage Ref (NBC) — I’ve been needing an excuse to use this picture of Seinfeld. Tonight’s panel features Jimmy Fallon, Sheryl Crow, and Kirstie Alley, and the lead-in is two hours of “Office” re-runs. Nice, I don’t have to watch TV tonight.

Bones (Fox) — New episodes return tonight. I’ve come to realize that this is basically “CSI: Castle” — or, more accurately, “Castle” is “Bones, She Wrote.” The formula for both shows: underrated sneaky-hot chick + square-jawed actor with previous role on a Joss Whedon show = instant cult following.

Real Housewives of New York City (Bravo) — I’ve grown to dislike these women the most out of all the other Housewives franchises, because media coverage makes them harder to ignore. This is YOUR fault, Page Six.

The Fugitive Chronicles (A&E) — Series premiere. Description from Yahoo: “This original docudrama brings to life the most compelling fugitive captures in recent history. Each one-hour episode dramatically reconstructs an infamous manhunt with gritty reenactments, fugitive narratives recreated from real testimony, and exclusive taped interviews with law enforcement officials.” Not my thing, but true-crime fans’ll probably like it.

The Vampire Diaries (CW) — Everyone I know who watches this is a girl. Does that make it a bad show? Yes.

The Tonight Show (NBC) — Justin Bieber is a guest tonight. As I understand it, America supposedly has a case of Bieber Fever, but I’m not really sure what he does. Does he sing? Is he an actor? No, don’t tell me. I actually don’t want to know. Side note: I’ve got a nasty case of beaver fever, which is something entirely different.

Ever since I covered “cellulite” “has-been” Jennifer Lopez on SNL, I’ve been hesitant to write about Hulu’s user-generated tags, because it’s really just a variant of the ongoing hate affair between Internet users and Jay Leno — and we all know I already do plenty of that here.

But I have to give credit where it’s due. So, to whichever Hulu user tagged “The Marriage Ref” with “worse than kitten snuff”: I salute you, sir. While I didn’t hate the most recent episode with Larry David and Ricky Gervais, I can understand the vitriol. And while tagging the show with hitler, worse than aids, and rapist is commendably hateful, it’s not necessarily newsworthy. No, it takes comparing a TV show to people getting off while watching kittens being murdered to make a headline around here. Nothing but the hottest industry news at Warming Glow!

[via BuzzFeed. Marriage Ref Hulu page. Leno Hulu page.]