“And what is the DEAL with married people arguing?” Ha ha, good one Jerry.
The Marriage Ref (NBC) — Series Premiere. Oh, you thought the 30 minutes on Sunday were terrible? It’s a FULL HOUR, people. And that’s tonight’s panel: Seinfeld with Tina Fey and Eva Longoria Parker.
The Office (NBC) — Anyone out there still watching this? I guess Pam gives birth tonight. And we get it for a full hour instead of “30 Rock.” Yay. (creepy image via here and here)
CSI: Original Flavor (CBS) — A member of the band Rascal Flatts is electrocuted by his own guitar in a (sadly) fictional story. Doesn’t “Rascal Flatts” sound like the worst apartment building ever? It should be an abandoned double-wide overrun with squirrels.
Burn Notice (USA) — Season finale. Awww, I always get sad when good TV shows have their season finales.
Project Runway (Lifetime) — I admit, I kind of miss watching this show. This is YOUR fault, Lifetime.
Real Housewives of Different Places (Bravo) — The O.C. women have their finale, immediately followed by the season 3 premiere of the New York City broads. Guhhhhh.
Archer (FX) — New episode tonight. “I’m afraid the lemur got into the pudding cups.” “Like I told you he would!”
As an aficionado of cheap, puerile humor, I always enjoy a good “That’s what she said” joke. The phrase has gone from “Wayne’s World” to tired irrelevance to ironic re-relevance thanks to Michael Scott’s overuse of it on “The Office.” In this Funny or Die sketch, Megan Mullally and Thomas Lennon (of “Reno 911!” and “The State”) create a history in which “That’s what she said” originated from a single slutty chick. Basically, it’s four minutes of different variations of the joke, and I therefore love it. Trust me, you don’t get the career I’ve had without dealing with a lot of genitals.
In advance of tonight’s episode of “The Office,” here’s a music video starring Mindy Kaling, Ed Helms, B.J. Novak, and the new girl on the show. I guess I should look up her name. Ellie Kemper. She plays Erin. It’s all auto-tuned and spoofy of the Lady Gaga hits that I wish I’d never heard (Get out of my head, “Poker Face”!).
Anyway, I don’t think this is the greatest thing ever, but I spent so much time trying to get NBC’s retardedly crappy video player to work that the only way I could justify the use of time was to make a post out of it. Way to make a video player that doesn’t work in Firefox, NBC. Also, there’s a skit about the fictional “making of” directed by Kaling that I actually found that funnier than the music video.
But seriously, the real point here is how much the video player sucks. Hey NBC, don’t get all snippy with copyright claims on YouTube if you can’t carry your weight online, jackasses.
The Office (NBC) — Finally, the one-hour special where Jim and Pam tie the knot. It’s become cool to trash the Jim-Pam story line for ruining “The Office,” which is why I enjoyed Alan Sepinwall’s defense of how the show has handled their relationship. I mean, I still wish the show was about Creed and Kelly going on a road trip, but I don’t hate Jim and Pam. Except when I look at the banner picture. Then I want to punch them a little.
Community (NBC) — Note the new time, live-TV watchers: 8:00/7:00 Central.
Flash Forward (ABC) — Whoops, I still haven’t watched last week’s DVR’d episode. I guess I’m not hooked.
My Small Breasts and I (BBC America) — Three women discuss their little boobs and how the ways they’ll go to improve their self-confidence. Hey ladies, it’s okay to have small breasts. You’re beautiful the way God made you. As long as you have a killer ass, I mean.
Fringe (Fox) — Leonard Nimoy returns to the show this week to help Mulder and Scully with a series of crimes that’s been connected to the shape-shifters.
MLB Playoffs (TBS) — Cardinals-Dodgers Game 2, Red Sox-Angels Game 1. Fack you, ya fackin’ Gaylos!
E! Investigates: Teenage Trafficking (E!) — Serious News Channel E! looks into teens who are forced into prostitution. With additional reporting by Roman Polanski.
Project Runway (Lifetime) — It was announced that Heidi Klum will be changing her last name to husband Seal’s last name. But she’ll keep on using “Klum” publicly. In a related story, Seal has a last name?
Tosh.0 (Comedy Central) — I almost forgot: Tosh is back with new episodes tonight, featuring a Web Redemption for Tron Guy. Watch it online now, if you’re into spoiling surprises.
There’s no accounting for taste, and people are particularly picky about what they think is funny, so I’m sometimes hesitant to write about what I like. But I watched five sitcom premieres last night, and the overall quality was too good not to discuss. Given the general crappiness of scripted comedy (and TV in general), it feels good to occasionally step up and say, “Hey, nice job, TV executives. You weren’t idiots for once.”
With that, here’s my ranking for the five shows I saw last night, starting at merely enjoyable and counting down to must-watch laugh riot. (Note that these rankings are only for the episode I watched, and do not speak to a show’s overall body of work.)
“The Office” filmed a scene at Niagara Falls yesterday, where Jim and Pam (John Krasinski and Jenna Fischer) had their wedding ceremony on a boat called Maid of the Mist.
Fischer [wore] a white empire-waist wedding gown with beaded trim, and Krasinski wore a black tuxedo with a boutonniere of two white flowers during their Maid of the Mist ride. The pair also wore blue Maid of the Mist slickers, but took them off as they neared the falls. Heavy mist soaked their clothes and left them dripping wet throughout several takes as the boat rocked in the water.
“None of us expected this whatsoever. The actors were completely drenched,” said Randy Cordray, producer. “It was like standing in your backyard and having someone spray a hose right in your face, but John and Jenna played their scene beautifully, and the troupers that they are, they powered through it.”
Oh wait. Spoiler alert? …Did I do that right? I always get confused about what’s a spoiler because people are so hypersensitive about this stuff. Like, Jim and Pam are engaged. Pam’s pregnant. SPOILER: they get married. I can hear the complaints now. “Aw man! But now that I know where they get married the entire season is ruined.” Yeah, well, if you’re taking a TV show that seriously, I just did you a favor.
