This guy cloned himself and recorded himself (himselves?) singing a variety of well-known TV theme songs (in harmony, no less). I wonder if his mom ever yells at him, “Stop playing with yourself!”

Whatever, I’m hung over. Below: full list of the TV shows and the time in the video that they appear.

0:01 Two and a Half Men
0:22 The Simpsons
0:36 The O.C.
1:00 Naruto
1:11 Family Guy
1:41 Married with Children
1:57 Cheers
2:16 That 70’s Show
2:41 Big Love
2:58 Freaks and Geeks
3:18 Malcolm in the Middle
3:35 X-Files
3:55 Firefly
4:09 The Office
4:24 The Fresh Prince of Bel-Air
4:44 Scrubs
4:54 True Blood
5:27 Charles in Charge
5:38 The Big Bang Theory
5:55 How I Met Your Mother
6:05 Mission Impossible
6:14 Friends

[via BuzzFeed]

The People’s Choice Awards were held last night, and as you can tell from last night’s What’s On Tonight, I either wasn’t aware of them or didn’t care to mention their existence. (Hint: it was both.) Anyway, Queen Latifah hosted for the fourth consecutive year, and absolutely nothing surprising about what the populace likes was revealed. Which is to say: vampire crap won lots of awards.

“Twilight” won four trophies, including favourite movie, franchise and on-screen team for the dreamy trio of Robert Pattinson, Kristen Stewart and Taylor Lautner, who also picked up the breakout male actor award.

The undead HBO fable “True Blood” and the soapy supernatural CW series “The Vampire Diaries” were respectively selected as favourite TV obsession and favourite new TV drama.

The full list of winners is here, and aside from the vampire stuff, it’s a fairly even mix of things that make me feel ill and worried about society (Favorite Comedy Movie: The Proposal) and things that give me the faintest glimmer of hope (Favorite TV Drama: “House” over “CSI” and “NCIS”). So the end result is a faint feeling of nausea tempered by apathy. Which makes this a pretty average day.

Would you like to pay five figures to be an extra on “True Blood”? If so, then it’s your lucky day, because the Gay, Lesbian, and Straight Education Network (GLSEN) Respect Awards have a charity auction raffling off just that.

Includes: a non-speaking, featured “extra” walk-on role on HBO’s hit series, TRUE BLOOD. Valid for one person however, the winner may bring a guest on set. Must be at least 18 years old. Availability is based on production schedule. Show tapes in LA. We can not guarentee that the scene the winner is in will make the final cut and be aired.

The next minimum bid you can make is $9,500, but this auction’s open for another week, so be prepared to go higher. And you’re gonna have to duel it out with me to be Anna Paquin’s fluffer, because I just sold my first edition hardcover Twilight books to get in the action. Finally, a chance for me to wear my vampire bite necklace!

(thanks to Woods for the tip)

In news that may possibly SHATTER THE EARTH, two actors who worked closely together on the set of a television show have begun dating. In this case, the rumored couple is “True Blood” vampires Alexander Skarsgard (Meekus!) and Evan Rachel Wood. From Lainey Gossip (via Socialite Life):

Evan Rachel Wood and Alexander Skarsgard are dating. Am told exclusively by an infallible source that it’s been several weeks now. And that she flew to Shreveport, Louisiana on Friday to visit him. Skarsgard is there working on Straw Dogs with Kate Bosworth…

[T]hey met, of course, on the set of True Blood, and were able to keep it low key, very underground while they were in LA, never venturing out to pap friendly locations, only sighted a few times discreetly, and so far the relationship is progressing well, they’re having fun together.

I don’t think this should come as a surprise, as Evan Rachel Wood is a sexy-ass redhead who’s been rumored to hump just about everyone she acts with. If you look at all the rumors about her over the years, she comes off as kind of a gigantic slut. But I don’t mean that in a bad way. Why do people always use “slut” as a pejorative? “Ooh, I hate sexually liberated women who put out!” Damn our Puritanical heritage, always making virtue a virtue.

Alexander Skarsgard is starting to generate buzz for being next in line for big-time Hollywood stardom, and it’s well-deserved for his back-to-back roles as two of the biggest badasses on cable TV in recent history: Sergeant Brad “Iceman” Colbert in the excellent “Generation Kill” and Eric Northman, the millennium-old viking vampire in “True Blood.” While Iceman and Eric are very different characters, Skarsgard brings a quiet authority to each, walking a menacing line between cool and deadly.

His biggest American role before that? Eight years ago, as Meekus in Zoolander, part of the trio of Ben Stiller’s dim-witted model friends who die in a freak gasoline fight accident. That kind of blows my mind. Apparently he spent the years in between focusing on a career in his native Sweden. It’s like, “Uh, Earth to Brint, you can be a star in other countries besides America.”

(thanks to bohemea and shortskirtlongjacket)

True Blood (HBO) — Evan Rachel Wood FINALLY makes an appearance.  She’s the only vampire on the show who doesn’t need makeup to achieve the requisite paleness. Also pictured above: Deborah Ann Woll as my girlfriend.

Mad Men (AMC) — This episode promises some Jane versus Joan cattiness (yay!) plus some more issues with Grandpa living in the Drapers’ house.  I can do without the Grandpa story line.  Should’ve just sent him to the nursing home.  My children are totally going to let me die alone, by the way.

Daytime Emmy Awards (CW) — These were headed for a cable broadcast until the CW “saved” them.  Why, I don’t know.  I don’t pretend to care, and neither should you.

Being Human (BBC America) — Season finale.  Stop me if you’ve heard this one: “A ghost, a werewolf, and a vampire live in a house…”  No really, that’s the premise.  Spoiler: they stop being polite and start getting real.

Futurama: Into the Wild Green Yonder (Comedy Central) — Two-hour special in which — **reads synopsis** — eh, the usual hijinks.

Tool Academy (VH1) — Season 2 premiere.  Once again, narcissistic cheating douchebags have been tricked into personality rehab by their moronically faithful girlfriends.  I prefer to pretend these people don’t exist.

Sunday Night Football: Bears at Broncos (NBC) — The ongoing implosion of the Broncos under new coach Josh McDaniels might be the single most delightful story of the offseason.  Watch as new Bears QB Jay Cutler picks apart his former team, and cross your fingers in the hope that ex-Bear Kyle Orton can throw another left-handed interception in the end zone.

Evan Rachel Wood finally makes her debut as the vampire queen Sophie-Anne on “True Blood” next Sunday, and there are two new photos of her looking super-hot and stylish as her character (high resolution here and here via bohemea).

That’s it.  That’s the entire post.  I’m not going to apologize for my odd fascination with Evan Rachel Wood.  She’s a good actress and she’s a hot pale redhead.  And she has a tattoo of an Edgar Allen Poe couplet.  And she has a history of questionably appropriate relationships with men decades older than she is, starting when she was 17.  Something about all that suggests that she’s into some kind of super-freaky kinky stuff. Stuff that I’ve never even heard about or imagined before.   What I’m trying to say is, I’d let her electrocute my nipples.

Mad Men (AMC) — Tonight: Don and Betty have an awkward dinner with the new British boss; Roger begins planning for his wedding (read: we get to see Jane – yay!); Peggy actually gets a story line this time.

True Blood (HBO) — Evan Rachel Wood is supposed to be in three episodes this season.  We haven’t seen her yet and there are only three episodes left, so I’m guessing she’s gonna show up just in time to F up that annoying Maryann.

Miss Universe Pageant (NBC) — It’s like the United Nations of hot chicks.  Urdouche Billy Bush co-hosts the event with “Deal or No Deal” suitcase holder Claudia Jordan.  Delightful gallery of the contestants here.

Patton Oswalt: My Weakness is Strong (Comedy Central) — New one-hour special from my third-favorite stand-up comedian working today (1. Chappelle 2. Louis CK. 3. Patton Oswalt 4. Jim Gaffigan).  Damn, I’m gonna be up late watching a lotta DVR’d TV tonight.

Kourtney and Khloé Take Miami (E!) — The other day I challenged myself to watch as much of this show as I could tolerate.  I made it through a minute and 23 seconds.

Merlin (NBC) — Oh hey, this show existed. It’s the season finale.

There Goes the Neighborhood (CBS) — This debuted without me noticing because I was on vacation and never watch CBS.  Anyway, this is the show where an entire neighborhood block is walled in and the families can’t leave.  It’s a big hit with prisoners and survivors of the Warsaw ghetto.

You know a series has a devoted fan base when you start getting paper doll cut-outs of the show’s characters, as is the case here with “True Blood.”  Above is uber-religious vixen Pam, giver of bathtub handjobs [EDIT: Sarah gives the handjobs. Pam is Eric's assistant. Sorry.] In the thumbnail is Lafayette, to whom I’m in debt for introducing me to the idea that “hooker” can be a term of endearment.

I like that the creator of these stuck with the show’s secondary characters.  That’s really the selling point of “True Blood” (besides the violence and nudity, of course).  No one cares whether Bill and his ridiculous accent can save Sookie’s fug ass from whatever peril she put herself into.  I want more of Eric (Viking warrior turned vampire rocking a velour track suit: thumbs-up), more of Pam Sarah breaking her marriage vows behind the altar, and above all else, more of Deborah Ann Woll as Jessica.  In the last episode, we learned that she’s going to be a virgin forever.  Just like me!

[bohemea]

Still probably not enough to make me watch it again. Louis C.K., who some would argue is the greatest stand-up act of his generation, will have a major role in the second season of “Parks and Recreation”. [Videogum]

Affianced! Anna Paquin is engaged to True Blood costar Stephen Moyer. Haha, Stephen, I’ve seen your fiancee’s tits. [Gabby Babble]

Don’t stop…impulse buying! The cast of Glee will be making a series of appearances at Hot Topic stores nationwide. It would probably make more sense for the cast of Twilight to do that, since that’s where vampires are made. [PopWatch]

Not as good as the X-Men relationship map, but it’ll do. A graphical representation of all the connections among characters in the Seinfeld universe. [MovieFill]

And here I thought “The Cleveland Show” was the abortion! POW ZING! The never aired Family Guy abortion episode will be given a table reading by the show’s cast. So, basically Seth McFarlane doing 600 voices, plus Mila Kunis? [Variety]

[Picture credit]